Why you should stop cyber-snooping your exes in 2025

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On a sunny afternoon, as I ventured out to grab some grub, I found myself hesitantly halted at that particularly disliked junction, where patience is often tested with an eternity-feeling wait for the signal to change.

Upon glancing to my left, there I spotted my former boyfriend. I decided to shoot him a text and received a warm reply. Momentarily sidetracked, I ended up veering off course and had to pull over. My appetite suddenly vanished, so I remained parked in my vehicle, once the scene of a Burger King, until I felt ready to resume driving again.

In my youth, I found myself fixated on ex-boyfriends after a split, leading me to feel physically unwell and suffer from extreme anxiety. As I’ve grown older, though, I’ve learned wiser ways. Consequently, during our most recent separation, I took the extra step of blocking my ex not just from communication channels, but even on Spotify.

One evening, after attending a Super Bowl gathering, I found myself unable to resist peeking. Tears streamed down my face all night long, over an image of him with what seemed to be his new love interest. For the following fortnight, I couldn’t stop talking about that picture and reminiscing about our cordial text exchange during our brief encounter at a traffic light.

After two weeks of emotional turmoil, I came to understand something: I was the one who caused my own distress, much like I often do. A simple minute-long stoplight encounter with him triggered me, not him. There’s no point in aggravating myself by stalking him on social media. It seems I will have to relive the highs and lows of our breakup all over again. But this time, I’ll be prepared if I run into him in public. It’s similar to navigating an awkward left turn at a traffic light: I can’t completely avoid it, but I can try to make the experience less uncomfortable.

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2025-04-02 17:14