USDH Launch: A Stablecoin So Exclusive, It’s Practically a Secret Society! 🤫

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Hyperliquid, that ever-so-daring blockchain circus, has unveiled USDH, its latest marvel 🎪, while Native Markets, the lucky winner of this digital lottery 🎉, now plays the role of “plumber” for reasons no one fully understands. At press time, USDH struts into the world as the 83rd most “stable” coin, valued at $24.23 million-enough to buy a small island… or a very confused llama. 🦙

The Great USDH Circus Begins: Native Markets Takes the Reins 🎪

After weeks of whispers, wagers, and wild speculation (mostly on whether this was a Ponzi scheme or just a *very* elaborate April Fools’ joke 🤹), Native Markets finally won the golden ticket to power USDH. Congrats! Now, please explain what “powering” means without using the word “blockchain.”

The numbers? Oh, the numbers! 📊 There’s 24.23 million USDH floating around, scattered across a whopping 59 wallets-because nothing says “decentralization” like a cozy dinner party for 59. 🍷 As of 1 p.m. Eastern, the coin’s already zipped through 1,935 transfers. Thrilling! Truly, the Venmo of the crypto elite.

A glimpse into the USDH spectacle: more action than a circus, less stability than a one-legged stool. 🐘

But here’s the plot twist! 🎭 Two wallets hold 82.89% of the supply. Yes, two. One has 41.63%, the other 41.26%. Imagine if two folks on your street owned all the sidewalks-and then charged you rent. That’s USDH. The remaining 17.11%? A crumb for the rest of us peasants. 🍞

Coinmarketcap claims USDH trades on Hyperliquid, Hyperswap, and five other platforms with names like “Project X” and “Raydium” (no, not a sci-fi villain). Daily volume? $853,000! Excluding Hyperliquid, which alone moved $1.87 million paired with USDC. Translation: the real party’s at Hyperliquid’s house, and everyone else is just blowing bubblegum. 💨

Yet in the grand $294.751 billion stablecoin universe, USDH is a speck. A. Speck. 🧠 At 0.00822% market share, it’s the equivalent of bringing a spoon to a gunfight. Meanwhile, Tether and USD Coin loom like skyscrapers, probably wondering, “Who invited the intern?” 🏙️

So, USDH: a stablecoin so concentrated, it makes your morning coffee look decentralized. Will it rise to glory or vanish like a crypto wallet password? 🤷♂️ Stay tuned-and by “stay tuned,” we mean “check your portfolio in six months and weep.” 😂

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2025-09-24 22:14