Michael Saylor’s Bitcoin Bonanza: A Comedy of Crypto Errors! 🚀📉

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Well, folks, it seems Michael Saylor’s grand strategy-aptly named Strategy (MSTR)-has hit a bit of a snag. The stock has nosedived to its lowest point in nearly four months, and if you’re wondering why, let me paint you a picture: a Bitcoin dip, a broader decline in crypto treasury firms, and Saylor’s sudden willingness to flood the market with more shares. What could possibly go wrong? 🤔

The stock price has taken an 8% tumble since Monday, which, coincidentally (or not), is around the same time Bitcoin decided to take a breather after hitting a jaw-dropping all-time high of $124,128 last Thursday. Talk about timing! 🕰️

Saylor Lowers the Bar: Sell MSTR, Buy Bitcoin 💰

In what can only be described as a masterclass in corporate flexibility, Saylor took to X (formerly Twitter, for those still catching up) to announce an update to the company’s MSTR Equity ATM Guidance. In essence, this means Strategy can now issue shares when MSTR trades below 2.5 times its net asset value (mNAV). Translation: “Hey, we can sell more shares whenever we feel like it!” 📊

The update spells out that when MSTR is undervalued, the company can “tactically issue MSTR” to cover debts, fund preferred equity dividends, and, of course, “when otherwise deemed advantageous to the company.” Because, you know, why not? 💸

Unsurprisingly, this didn’t sit well with some MSTR shareholders who felt this was a complete U-turn from the Q2 earnings report, which promised share issuance would only happen to pay debts or fund dividends. Others, however, saw it as a win for Bitcoin, as it could mean Strategy buys more BTC. Silver linings, right? 🌈

At the time of writing, Strategy’s mNAV is sitting at a modest 1.55, according to company data. Not exactly the promised land. 📉

Saylor’s Announcement: Dividing Opinions Like a Pizza 🍕

Crypto trader Kale Abe summed it up perfectly: “He’s literally telling you straight up he’s gonna buy a… ton more BTC.” Bold strategy, Cotton. Let’s see if it pays off. 🤑

Meanwhile, Bitcoin maxi and developer Endre Stolsvik chimed in, pointing out that the previous “no issue below mNAV 2.5” rule was too strict. “We’re far away, now at 1.59,” he said. So, you know, relax. 😅

Over the past month, MSTR has declined by a staggering 21.04% and is now trading at $336.57. The last time it was at this level was back in April, when Bitcoin was chilling at $84,030. Ah, simpler times. 🕰️

And it’s not just MSTR feeling the heat. Other Bitcoin-heavy public companies have also seen their stock prices take a dive. MARA Holdings is down 19.44%, Coinbase Global Inc has plummeted 26.97%, and Riot Platforms has slipped 14.69%. It’s a crypto bloodbath, folks! 🩸

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2025-08-20 08:21