Bitcoin’s 24-hour plunge continues like a reality TV star avoiding accountability-no end in sight. It’s now hitting a six-month low of $95,500 after shedding $10K faster than a cat dodging a bath. 📉
No clear reason for the chaos? How original. Remember April’s tariff tantrum? This time, the crypto world’s collective meltdown is fueled by whispers that Strategy might be selling BTC. Because obviously, chaos is the only stable currency here. 🙄
The rumor mill started with a shady X account (10K followers, so trustworthy) that’s about as reliable as a weather forecast in a hurricane. But of course, Crypto Tony (550K followers, obviously) retweeted it like it was gospel. Influencer economics, everyone! 📣
Enter the crypto sleuths: Lookonchain swooped in like a digital Batman, revealing the “sale” was actually a $5.8B internal wallet shuffle. $1B? Cute. The real drama here is whether custodial moves count as cardio for blockchain analysts. 💸
Strategy moved 58,915 $BTC ($5.77B) to new wallets today, likely for custody purposes.
– Lookonchain, proving once again that blockchain is just group therapy for paranoid investors. 🧠
Michael Saylor, meanwhile, is out here like a jilted lover refusing to sell BTC. “Not a chance,” he says, while Strategy hoards 641,000 BTC like a dragon guarding gold. Spoiler: They’re not sharing. 🐉
And yet, Bitcoin’s price is in free-fall. It briefly flirted with $104K after Trump’s shutdown-ending bill-because of course crypto’s mood swings hinge on politicians. It’s now at $95,500, its lowest since May. Liquidations? $1.2B gone. Traders wrecked? 260K daily. Sounds like a party! 🎉

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2025-11-14 16:09