Vindictive playlist for your Valentine's Day

Approximately 14 million tunes in the realm of mainstream music throughout history can be classified as love songs. These are compositions that celebrate the thrill of deep affection towards a person and extol their virtues, irrespective of who they might be. Love is undeniably the most frequently chosen theme for any song, transcending all musical genres.

In second place comes a multitude of songs that convey heartbreak, approximately 13.5 million if you round it off. These tunes are mostly deeply felt ballads expressing longing for someone or the struggle to move past the pain. Many of these tracks present a mature perspective on relationships and, at their core, reflect personal growth – an undercurrent of wisdom born of experience. In simpler terms, it’s a collection of heartbreaking songs that show the evolution of feelings and understanding in love and loss.

Those are not the kinds of songs we will be discussing today.

On the occasion of Valentine’s Day, 2025, when the world appears chaotic for numerous individuals, let’s discuss a unique type of breakup song – one that doesn’t pardon or move on. Instead, it harbors deep resentment and anger. This kind of song is unapologetic about its bitterness, often expressing feelings of revenge and vindication. To put it bluntly, the song is a raw, emotional outpouring of a massive grudge. (Note: The censored term used here will play a substantial role in the following discourse.)

In this context, “massive f*g grudge” refers to an intense and unforgiving resentment.

Songs to rage to if you are having a vindictive Valentine’s Day

For as long as music has been around, these types of songs can be categorized into three main groups. If you happen to be the one who hurt me deeply, I might opt for a passive-aggressive approach by subtly hinting that my life is not going well without you. Alternatively, I could choose the indirect route and imply that my pain has led me to believe bad things about you. These thoughts might be based on reality or merely my imagination. To give an example, consider Spooky Tooth’s 1973 album titled “You Shattered My Heart, So I Shattered Your Reputation“, which unfortunately did not contain any songs that lived up to the title.

In a more direct manner, let me express my honest thoughts: You’re incredibly easy to understand when it comes to your actions, which, unfortunately, paint a picture of someone facing significant challenges. I believe constructive criticism could be beneficial in this case.

Currently, I’m planning to select tunes from various genres and time periods, except for hip hop. The reason is that I could easily fill the playlist with songs like Eminem’s “Kill You” or other explicit sex-themed tracks, which I prefer not to include. Instead, I’ll let others handle that. To be honest, the only song I might miss out on due to this restriction is Scroobius Pip’s “You Will See Me,” and I’m still a bit puzzled about its meaning.

And no Taylor. I mean, that kind sounds like a list all to itself, right?

Alright then, if you’re seeking a Taylor Swift tune, rewind to the beginning and select “Picture to Burn.” It’s quite fitting for the feelings I’m experiencing today, don’t you think? After all, isn’t it common to dislike an ex’s annoying old truck?

After addressing any necessary disclaimers, let me share with you your vengeful Valentine’s playlist for 2025, arranged by time of release.

In this way, the text maintains a conversational and easy-to-understand tone, while also providing clarity about the content being shared.

“I Shot Mr. Lee” by the Bobbettes (1960)

50s purists might argue that violence was non-existent back then, but let me tell you from my gaming perspective as a time traveler, the Bobbettes sure proved them wrong! These ladies were quite the sensation in the late 1950s, scoring a massive hit with their love song “Mr. Lee” in ’57. Mr. Lee was described as the most handsome sweetheart one could ever see, quite the catch indeed. Fast forward a few years, and things took an unexpected turn. The cheerful “One, two, three – Look at Mr. Lee – Three, four, five – Look at him jive…” had undergone a makeover, if you will. The jovial tune was reimagined, shedding light on a more assertive and playful side of Mr. Lee, giving the song a whole new vibe!

“One, two, three – I shot Mr. Lee – Three, four, five – I got tired of his jive…”

“Don’t Think Twice, It’s All Right” by Bob Dylan (1963)

This song is undeniably a subtle yet powerful post-relationship anthem, reminiscent of Dylan’s exceptional ability to convey heartbreak (“If You See Her Say Hello”) and bitterness (“Idiot Wind”). The presence of these songs on his masterpiece album, “Blood on the Tracks,” underscores the comprehensive portrayal of a breakup it offers. “Don’t Think Twice” was penned earlier in his career.

Approximately twelve years prior, in the year 1963, the album “The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan” was released when he was only 22. With just his simple finger-strummed acoustic guitar and sorrowful harmonica, this poignant gem is all that provides a backdrop…

While I’m not accusing you of being cruel – there were opportunities for improvement, though I can let it slide – essentially, you squandered valuable time of mine. However, rest assured, it’s nothing to worry about.

“You’re So Vain” by Carly Simon (1972)

In 1963, Leslie Gore reached number 5 with “Judy’s Turn to Cry.” Contrary to popular belief, this song isn’t about a bitter breakup. Rather, it’s a song about seeking revenge when the woman who took one’s partner is going to suffer. (Cue sinister mustache twirl.) This catchy pop hit from the early days might be one of the earliest examples I know that embodies vengefulness.

A full ten years after Leslie chuckled as Judy wept, Carly rose to fame with her venom aimed squarely at an old flame who reached the pinnacle of success. The identity of this ex has remained a topic of discussion since then. Simon herself later revealed that it was inspired by a combination of three men. However, for many, there’s no doubt in their minds – it was Warren Beatty all along; knowing the others isn’t necessary.

You are always in the right place, but when you’re not, it seems like you’re either a secret agent or close friend’s spouse. And let me tell you, you have such an air of self-importance that this song could easily be about you.

“Go Your Own Way” by Fleetwood Mac (1977)

One factor that turned “Rumours” into a massive hit in 1977 was its raw emotionality. The band members were experiencing breakups at the time, and they expressed these feelings beautifully in polished and professional pop-rock tunes. The opening single was Lindsey Buckingham’s response to Stevie Nicks ending their relationship, while “Dreams” served as the album’s second single, giving Nicks a chance to respond. However, before that, she had to sing backup on a song that was clearly about her.

“Tell me why everything turned around – Packing up, shacking up’s all you want to do…”

“Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong” by the Spin Doctors (1991)

On their first album, the band known for jam sessions crafted three fantastic pop-rock tracks. Two of these – “Two Princes” and “Jimmy Olsen’s Blues” – follow a common narrative of an underdog trying to win over a girl amidst tough circumstances, usually being less wealthy or lacking superpowers, as often seen in popular stories. However, the lead single was a song about a breakup, expressing strong feelings of resentment and anger, which is evident from its title. If you’re unsure, take a look at the opening verse…

Life has become significantly more peaceful since she departed – Life has become much more joyful with her absence.

“You Oughta Know” by Alanis Morissette (1995)

As a devoted fan, let me tell you this: There’s no one more enraged than this person I’m talking about. The Bobbettes might have found inspiration to confront Mr. Lee, but they appeared downright content with the entire situation. But trust me, they weren’t even close to being as furious as 21-year-old Alanis Morissette was during her breakout hit.

Following a sorrowful and subtly aggressive opening note where she expresses her well-wishing towards her ex, she releases an outpouring of emotions, leaving everyone captivated…

I hope this message doesn’t interrupt your meal, Mr. Duplicity – it feels like I’ve been overlooked – It was quite hurtful to find myself replaced so swiftly – Could I be on your mind when you spend time with her?

“The Last Song” by Sleater-Kinney (1995)

Was there a significant event happening in 1995? Was it Bill Clinton or perhaps the start of a shift from the more conservative 1980s, where artists, particularly female artists, gained the freedom to express complex feelings candidly? That’s what Carrie Brownstein and Corin Tucker did on their first album. The final track embodied this change with its dual meaning title.

On this occasion, I’ve discovered the solution – I know now how to express myself forcefully – I owe you nothing! – I have no connection to you! – You cannot strip me of everything! – I am independent from you!

“Gives You Hell” by The All-American Rejects (2008)

In their second album, The Rejects appeared to be hiding a romantic relationship, keeping it as a clandestine affair. By their third album, it seems they’ve parted ways. However, Tyson Ritter appears quite upbeat about the situation. Ritter revealed that the song was not born out of a personal romantic breakup but is aimed at anyone who mistreated you. Yet, the lyrics clearly reference an old flame.

Despite giving off the impression that he’s following the common saying “the best revenge is living well,” he openly acknowledges that he secretly hopes the subject of the song experiences a great deal of misery.

Every day, I greet the sunrise with a broad grin that always seems fitting, while you’re likely grinding away in your traditional 9-5 job. It makes me ponder, what must it feel like for you?

“F**K You” by CeeLo Green (2010)

This song isn’t strictly about anger towards an ex, so it might not fit perfectly on this list. However, its energetic and straightforward nature made me want to include it as a nod to the theme. CeeLo Green is a fascinating figure in contemporary pop music, capable of creating beautiful, transcendent melodies, but also seeming to deliberately undermine his own career success.

In 2010, he reached great success with a lively song he co-wrote with Bruno Mars that captured the uncomfortable situation when your closest friend begins dating an ex of yours. The lyrics, “forget you,” were used instead of the original, uncensored title in radio versions. To clarify, while the song is primarily aimed at the friend, the woman isn’t excluded from its implications.

“I guess the change in my pocket wasn’t enough – I’m like, f**k you and-a f**k her too”

“P.S. I Hate You” by Reel Big Fish (2012)

Fifty years after The Beatles put out “P.S. I Love You” alongside “Love Me Do,” Reel Big Fish, using their horns and fast-paced ska rhythm, tackled a different theme in the same vein. It’s suggested that Aaron Barrett may not have been feeling particularly cheerful when composing songs for the album “Candy Coated Fury.

As a devoted fan, I can’t help but notice the intriguing song titles like “Everyone Else is an A*e” and “Your Girlfriend Sucks.” These titles suggest a hint of melancholy beneath the irresistible melodies. On the penultimate track, there’s no attempt to conceal this darkness, as if he’s inviting us to delve deeper into his thoughts.

Originally, upon our initial encounter, had I been aware – I would have swiftly fled or kept my distance. Indeed, you possess traits of wickedness, ruthlessness, harshness, and frigidity – Those characteristics are yours, undoubtedly.

“(This Song is Definitely Not About a Boy)” by Makeshift Shelters (2015)

DC’s temporary shelter band, Makeshift Shelters, put out their debut album in 2015. By the time I listened to it a year afterwards, the group had already disbanded. In a marvelously veiled manner, they announced their split with the statement – “we’re parting ways because whatever.” It’s quite unfortunate. The raw criticism of an ex-partner by Ella Boissonnault is as powerful as classic Alanis Morissette. Following the breakup, she established Lady Pills and a new album from them is expected later this year.

At a relatively young age, I must admit I wasn’t very wise. Somehow, you managed to deceive me into thinking you were exceptional. Unfortunately, those tacky sweaters you loaned will not be returned, and just so you know, that was a truly poor-quality mixtape.

“Vomit” by Microwave (2016)

This is quite complex retaliation. Initially, it seems like a common complaint from an Atlanta band about a failed relationship. However, the peaceful tone of the initial verse gives way to an intense, melodic outburst in heavy metal style when the anger erupts.

I’ll empty your drawers and clutter your sink – Arranging things just as you seem to dislike the most – For I don’t intend to comfort you when you’re upset – No, love won’t flow from me, as I’m too jaded for sentimentality and illusion.

“F**k You Bitch” by Walker Wheeler, Jr. (2016)

It’s likely not necessary to delve too deeply into details here, isn’t it? The titles of Wheeler’s first album, “Redneck S**t“, are rather inappropriate for polite conversation. It’s a blend of camp and country music, similar to how Bloodhound Gang approaches rap rock. This song is quite straightforward, to put it mildly.

I’m really upset with you for causing me pain. I find it disappointing that your actions have created distance between us and our friends. I also hope that whatever issues you may be dealing with, they don’t lead to loneliness in your life.

“good 4 u” by Olivia Rodrigo (2021)

I didn’t mention Taylor, and Olivia wasn’t part of the conversation. The hit song from her first album may have been inspired by Paramore, but its theme is reminiscent of Morissette and Makeshift Shelters. It seems she might not be entirely sincere when she sings the title lyrics with intensity.

It’s wonderful to see you looking so joyful and vibrant! I wish I could say the same for myself. You seem to be thriving quite well on your own, which is fantastic. Keep up the good work!” (Note: This response does not directly address the harsh tone or language of the original statement.)

“Kill Bill” by SZA (2022)

Initially, the Bobbettes gleefully targeted Mr. Lee with their gunfire. As we approach the conclusion, we’ve returned to our starting point. SZA’s dreamy pop anthem of revenge cleverly blurs the distinctions between fantasy and reality. It garnered numerous Grammy nominations and arguably deserved the Song of the Year accolade. In essence, it serves as a theme song for lovers exhibiting sociopathic tendencies across the globe.

It’s not a good thought, but I find myself contemplating harming my ex – It’s a dangerous path I’m on – His new girlfriend is coming up next – I can’t believe this is where I am – I might end up hurting myself instead, as strange as it sounds – Despite everything, I still have feelings for him – I’d rather face the consequences of my actions, including potential imprisonment, than live without him.

“Fell in Love With a Piece of S**t” by Mellohoney (2024)

Initially, I had completed my list of 15 songs. However, I came across another one, by a Canadian band that was new to me. This song, far from being about love, has a rhythm similar to a rawer version of Flogging Molly, originating from the cold North. It starts off with a hint of romance but quickly delves into what the band truly wanted to express.

I introduced you to my parents, friends – they didn’t appreciate your disrespectful behavior – they accused you of dishonesty, thoughtlessness, and self-centeredness – they said I had given my affection to someone worthless.”

This version maintains the original’s tone and message but uses more polite language. It also removes any explicit swearing, making it appropriate for a wider audience.

And what more is there to say? Happy Valentines Day.

2025-02-14 17:03

Vindictive playlist for your Valentine’s Day