Amazon: A Quiet Calculation

Amazon, like any large undertaking, is composed of segments. North America and its international operations, the visible face of the company, account for the bulk of sales – 82% of the $716.9 billion reported in 2025. They are, for the most part, functional. They generate revenue. They provide employment. But the true engine, the quiet heart of the machine, resides in Amazon Web Services (AWS). A business that, while not always remarked upon in the breathless pronouncements of market analysts, consistently delivers a disproportionate share of the profit – $45.6 billion, a respectable sum, even in these inflated times.

Software’s Midlife Crisis

Turns out, they’re panicking. The S&P North American Technology Software Index, which sounds like something they invented to justify a quarterly newsletter, is down over 30%. It’s a bear market for software, apparently. Which feels…dramatic. Like the industry is suddenly having a midlife crisis, buying a motorcycle, and listening to a lot of Steppenwolf.

Red Flags & Dividend Dreams

The S&P 500, they tell me, is up a ridiculous amount over the last three years. Eighty percent, apparently. Which is…fine. Except, lurking beneath the surface, are a couple of signals that remind me of that time I accidentally signed up for a competitive eating contest. Everything looked promising at first, but then the hot dogs started piling up, and I realized I’d made a terrible mistake. These aren’t flashing neon warnings, more like subtle shifts in the air pressure. Things are…tight.

Why Uniswap’s Attempt to Soar is Like a Cat Trying to Swim: Spoiler Alert, It’s Not Pretty!

Then there was the Bitwise spot ETF application, which also tried to steal the limelight. The market reacted faster than a cat to a laser pointer. Within just two hours of the BUIDL integration news, UNI surged like a teenager who just found out it’s pizza night-up by over 40%! But, of course, reality came knocking, and within the same day, we saw a sharp correction that made everyone feel like they’d just stepped off a roller coaster and realized they’d left their dignity at the top.

Sweet Dividends & Fizzy Fortunes

Let’s have a peek at two particularly plump specimens: Coca-Cola (KO 0.41%) and Pepsico (PEP 0.75%). They’re not exactly brimming with sunshine and lollipops, mind you – they’re businesses, after all – but they are remarkably good at turning water and potatoes into a stream of income for sensible people like yourself.

Alphabet: A Five-Year Prognosis

Fortunately, Alphabet, displaying a resilience one might expect from an entity with such vast resources, has begun to reassert its dominance. Some even claim it now possesses the leading artificial intelligence, a bold assertion, of course, but one that seems to be gaining traction. Consequently, its performance over the past year has surpassed even the capricious whims of the S&P 500. And, dare I say, it is likely to continue doing so. The reasons, like the layers of bureaucracy within the company itself, are numerous and surprisingly intricate.

Joby & Nvidia: A Fluttering Ascent?

Joby Aviation Aircraft

The collaboration centres on Joby’s adoption of Nvidia’s IGX Thor Platform, intended to bolster its Superpilot autonomous flight technology. It’s a curious alignment, highlighting the diverging paths of Joby, Archer Aviation, and that spectral presence, Boeing’s Wisk. Each firm appears to be playing a different game, though whether any of them understand the rules remains to be seen.

Nvidia: The House Always Wins

Right now, the name on everyone’s lips, and in every algorithm, is Nvidia. (NVDA 2.21%). It’s the obvious play. Even the folks who wouldn’t know an AI from a hole in the ground have heard of it. It’s been riding a wave for a while now, and waves, as anyone who’s spent time near the ocean knows, eventually break. But this one feels different. The projections are… substantial.

Binance’s Billion-Dollar Oopsie: Fired Whistleblowers, Crypto Chaos, and Iranian Tea Parties

According to Fortune’s deep dive into Binance’s internal documents (which I assume were hidden behind a velvet rope in a folder labeled “Oops”), members of the compliance team noticed something peculiar: entities linked to Iran were throwing a $1 billion party between March 2024 and August 2025. And no, they weren’t just buying Persian rugs. These transactions, conducted via the Tron blockchain, could be a spicy violation of U.S. sanctions laws. But hey, who’s counting? Not Binance, apparently.

Three Trillion-Dollar Companies? Seriously?

Amazon, Taiwan Semiconductor, and Broadcom. These are the names everyone’s throwing around. And look, I get it. They’re big companies. They make things. But the sheer assumption that they’re destined for this…monumental growth? It’s just… presumptuous. And the charts! All these glossy charts, like they actually mean something. It’s all just lines on a screen. Lines!