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it’s regular bank money, just dressed for the blockchain age. Because who doesn’t want their savings to whisper “HODL” in a fancy accent? 💸

The bug was found by someone named GrumpyLaurie55348, who sounds like they’re perpetually mid-tweetstorm. They dropped the hot gossip on GitHub December 8, 2025. No exploits yet, but developers are sweating bullets as Babylon becomes the Beyoncé of Bitcoin DeFi – everywhere, unavoidable, and now… slightly glitchy. 💅

On January 9, WazirX, that paragon of crypto trustworthiness, began distributing Recovery Tokens to its beleaguered patrons. A court-mandated gesture of goodwill, perhaps? Or merely a bureaucratic tango to appease the masses whose funds remain locked in a digital purgatory since 2024’s fateful breach. The tokens, apportioned like Christmas crackers to approved claimants, now glimmer temptingly within the app’s Funds tab. One might almost forget they’re non-tradable, non-liquid, and legally dubious.

According to client notes from Morgan Stanley (NYSE: MS) and Citigroup Inc. (NYSE: C), the Fed will set in motion at least two cuts of 25 basis points in 2026. Morgan Stanley, moving its calendar like a weather-worn map, replaced January and April with June and September 2026.

Ethereum’s co-founder Vitalik Buterin released a letter so passionate, it could make a blockchain blush. In it, he defended Roman Storm, a developer who, shockingly, created software that doesn’t spy on you. How revolutionary!

A world of shifting tides and trembling hands is sharpening investor focus on Bitcoin’s climb toward $100,000. Crypto strategist Matt Mena of 21shares, with a brain as sharp as a plowshare, shared his thoughts on Jan. 9, 2026, arguing that policy signals and liquidity conditions are quietly aligning like a well-timed harvest, favoring a renewed move into six-figure territory. 🌾

DOGE’s 0.35% Rise: A Small Step for Man, a Giant Leap for Bots! 🤖📈 But hey, every journey starts with a single step-assuming you don’t fall off a cliff. 🏔️

At this moment, SHIB hovers around $0.0000087, a market cap just over $5.1 billion. It sits in the lower reaches of the top twenty, where the difference between ranks is thinner than a rumor in a tavern. In this theater, a single directional shove can redraw the cast without any grand rally shaking the stage.

Enter the oracle known as Doctor Profit, who cautions that the dominant cryptocurrency could still wade into the 70,000 zone, pointing to a sudden, gargantuan injection of liquidity by the U.S. Federal Reserve as a red cape to a very excited bull. The suggestion: the liquidity wand might frighten other risk assets into behaving badly. 🪄💸