So, Ethereum is down 25% this year. Twenty-five percent! And people are still talking about it like it’s a growth stock. It’s like, what are we doing here? Shiba Inu is also having a rough go, market cap shrinking. Honestly, the whole thing just feels… exhausting. Someone asked me if I’d put $2,500 into either one. $2,500. Like it’s going to solve anything. But fine, let’s play this game.
Ethereum: They Keep Adding Features, I Guess
They’ve been “upgrading” Ethereum. That’s what they call it. Upgrading. It used to be slow and expensive. Now it’s…slightly less slow and slightly less expensive. They’re bragging about gas fees being down to fifteen cents. Fifteen cents! Like that’s a significant improvement in the grand scheme of things. I remember when a stamp cost more than that. And it actually did something.
Now they’ve got this “Glamsterdam” thing coming up. Proto-danksharding. Seriously? Who comes up with these names? It sounds like a Dutch punk band. Apparently, it’s going to make things even faster and cheaper. They’re talking about compressing transactions. Compressing. Like our lives aren’t already compressed enough. They say it’ll help them compete with Solana. Solana! Another one of these…things. It’s just a constant arms race of digital nothingness.
The point is, they’re throwing features at it, hoping something sticks. It’s like when a restaurant adds seven new appetizers and suddenly expects a Michelin star. It’s not how it works. But fine, it might make Ethereum a little more… palatable for developers. More incentive to buy and hold. Wonderful. Just what we needed.
Shiba Inu: It’s a Picture of a Dog, Okay?
Look, it’s a meme coin. A dog coin. It went up because people thought it was funny. Now it’s going down. Shocking. They’re trying to build an “ecosystem” around it. Shibarium. It’s a Layer-2 chain. And it generated…one dollar in fees? One dollar? I spend more than that on coffee. And I resent it. Eighty-one dollars in trading volume. It’s insulting, frankly. They’re pretending this is a viable investment strategy.
The whole thing is based on “hope and a prayer.” That’s their business plan. Hope and prayer. I’ve seen more solid financial strategies written on cocktail napkins. It’s a speculative bubble waiting to burst, and frankly, good riddance.
So, if you absolutely must spend $2,500 on one of these things, just pick Ethereum. It’s marginally less ridiculous. But seriously, just don’t. Take a vacation. Buy a nice toaster. Anything would be a better use of your money. And please, for the love of all that is holy, stop asking me about crypto. It’s a nightmare.
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2026-02-06 09:22