Timing is everything, right? Pi Network decided to drop their AI-powered identity verification update just before the December token unlock. Coincidence? Or did they finally realize that “verified” means “not a robot” in crypto-speak? 🤖💸
Key Takeaways (Because You’re Not Paying Attention)
- Pi Network’s AI now “helps” with KYC. Spoiler: It still takes 30 mining sessions, but now the AI yells at you faster. 🚀
- 190 million Pi tokens will unlock in December. That’s like finding a $43 million piggy bank… if pigs could code. 🐖💻
- Validator rewards delayed until Q1 2026. Because who doesn’t want to wait 18 months for a payout? 😴
AI Steps Into the KYC Bottleneck (Because Humans Were Too Slow)
Pi’s new AI “solution” claims to halve the cases needing human review. Genius! Now you can just send 30 selfies of your cat to an algorithm and call it “verified.” 🐱📸
Newcomers and dormant users, rejoice! Your 30 mining sessions are now processed faster… as long as your cat doesn’t blink. Fast Track is still broken, but hey, now everyone gets the same “speed” – which is basically glacial with a side of sarcasm. 🐢
The 190 million token unlock is here to raise the stakes. Good luck, everyone! Just don’t forget to finish your KYC… unless you want to be stuck in limbo forever. 😭
Validator Rewards and Data Processing (AKA Why Your Payout Is Late)
Validators, the unsung heroes of this chaos, now get their rewards in 2026. Pi blames “heavy data processing.” Translation: They’re still sorting through 2021’s selfies. 📁
17.5 million verified users? Congrats! But only 15.7 million migrated. That’s 3 million people stuck in “partially verified” purgatory. Pro tip: Finish your KYC, or become a ghost in the machine. 👻
A Broader Ecosystem Push (Because Why Not?)
Pi’s latest move? Joining the EU’s MiCA framework. Because nothing says “legitimacy” like regulatory compliance… until it doesn’t. 🇪🇺
New partnerships with CiDi Games? Great! Now you can play Web3 games where your Pi coins buy you virtual snacks. Because nothing’s more useful than a blockchain-based snack. 🍕
Pi Price: Still $0.2265, Because Hope Is a Currency Too
PI’s price? Still stuck at $0.2265. The RSI is 45 – basically the crypto version of “meh.” The MACD is flat, so don’t expect fireworks. Traders are waiting for the December unlock to see if this is a revolution or a glitch. 🕯️
The information provided is for educational purposes. If you lost money in crypto, don’t @ us. Or do. We’ll just ignore you. 🚫
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2025-12-06 14:21