Yields & The Implausibility of Income

It appears, after a period of frankly bewildering market behavior – a situation not entirely dissimilar to attempting to herd cats wearing roller skates – dividend stocks are, shall we say, regaining a modicum of favor. 2026, as the humans are calling it, seems to be offering a slightly less hostile environment for those of us who appreciate a regular trickle of income. For three years, the large-cap tech behemoths held sway, but even they are subject to the universe’s inherent tendency towards chaos. The WisdomTree U.S. Total Dividend ETF, for example, has been outperforming the S&P 500 by a statistically significant (though, let’s be honest, probably meaningless in the grand scheme of things) 5% year-to-date, propelled by the unlikely alliance of value and defensive stocks.

However, the yields themselves remain… modest. The Vanguard S&P 500 ETF, a perfectly respectable instrument, offers a yield of approximately 1.1%. (Which, if you think about it, is roughly equivalent to the annual interest earned on a slightly damp biscuit left under a radiator for a week.) To achieve anything remotely resembling a substantial yield – say, in the 3-4% range – one must venture into the realms of higher-risk, more specialized investments. And to find yields exceeding that? Well, that’s where things get interesting… and, potentially, a little bit improbable.

Income-focused investors, ever the optimists, have been exploring various strategies. Here are four ETFs that have seen some (relatively) positive inflows over the past three and twelve months, though they haven’t quite achieved the level of widespread adoration usually reserved for kittens and free pizza. (A baffling omission, if you ask me.)

1. JPMorgan Equity Premium Income ETF

The JPMorgan Equity Premium Income ETF (JEPI 1.04%) was, in 2022, something of a success story amidst a rather unpleasant market correction. As fixed income instruments began to exhibit a distinct aversion to positive returns, covered-call strategies emerged as a viable alternative. (Think of it as attempting to build a sandcastle during a hurricane – unlikely, but occasionally achievable.) Yields soared, briefly reaching double digits, and billions of dollars flowed in. Returns have cooled somewhat during the recent AI boom (a phenomenon best described as a collective hallucination amongst silicon and algorithms), but investor interest remains surprisingly robust. Assets under management now exceed $43 billion, with an additional $2.3 billion arriving in 2026 alone. The current yield stands at a respectable 7.6%.

This ETF is constructed around a portfolio of low-volatility stocks, making it particularly well-suited to the current market environment. It performed admirably in 2022, and could, conceivably, do so again in 2026. (Though, naturally, past performance is no guarantee of future results. The universe, as a rule, doesn’t care about guarantees.)

2. JPMorgan Nasdaq Equity Premium Income ETF

The JPMorgan Nasdaq Equity Premium Income ETF (JEPQ 1.66%) is, essentially, the Nasdaq 100 version of the fund above. Launched in 2022, it quickly capitalized on the popularity of its sister fund and benefited from the prevailing bullish sentiment surrounding tech stocks. The current yield is a rather eye-catching 11.4%.

This higher yield is a direct consequence of the increased volatility inherent in Nasdaq 100 stocks compared to a portfolio of low-volatility names. If the major U.S. indexes continue to meander sideways (a distinct possibility, given the inherent unpredictability of human behavior), JEPQ could, conceivably, outperform the Invesco QQQ ETF. (Though, naturally, the probability of that happening is approximately equal to the chance of a penguin spontaneously developing the ability to fly.)

3. Global X SuperDividend ETF

The Global X SuperDividend ETF (SDIV 3.47%) is about as pure a high-yield equity play as one is likely to find. Its strategy is elegantly simple: include the 100 highest-yielding equity securities globally (subject to minimal liquidity requirements). Beyond that, it imposes almost no restrictions. (It’s a bit like asking a chef to create a masterpiece using only ingredients found in a vending machine – the results are… unpredictable.)

The result is a portfolio heavily weighted towards financials (32%), real estate investment trusts (20%), and energy (18%). It’s also remarkably diversified geographically, with roughly equal allocations to the U.S., developed markets, and emerging markets. The current yield is 7.3%.

Investors have demonstrably approved of this fund over the past year, with 14 consecutive months of net inflows, including $60 million in March 2026. If that number holds, it will represent the largest monthly inflow in 12 years. (A statistically significant event, though its ultimate meaning remains… elusive.)

4. VanEck BDC Income ETF

The VanEck BDC Income ETF (BIZD 1.85%) is a fund that investors seem to dip their toes into cautiously, and with good reason. It invests in business development companies (BDCs), which means heavy exposure to private credit. (Think of it as building a house of cards on a trampoline – potentially rewarding, but inherently precarious.)

Its largest holdings include Ares Capital, Blue Owl Capital, and the Blackstone Secured Lending Fund. Blue Owl, in particular, has recently attracted attention for freezing investor capital and halting redemption requests. (A development that, while not entirely unexpected, serves as a useful reminder that even the most sophisticated financial instruments are subject to the whims of fate.) While there is potential in this segment of the market, private credit can be illiquid and risky, as many investors are discovering. The VanEck BDC Income ETF offers an attractive yield of 9.6%, but caution is advised. (And a healthy dose of skepticism.)

2026-03-22 16:13

1. JPMorgan Equity Premium Income ETF

2. JPMorgan Nasdaq Equity Premium Income ETF

3. Global X SuperDividend ETF

4. VanEck BDC Income ETF

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