Dear Esteemed Readers, it is with the utmost gravity (and a dash of bemusement) that we inform you of the son of a most esteemed individual, now occupying the lofty position of President of the United States, shall soon grace the shores of Tokyo, Japan, in September 2025. His purpose? To attend a shareholder meeting of a Japanese Bitcoin treasury firm, Metaplanet Inc., whose very name evokes the most peculiar of endeavors.
At this assembly, the shareholders shall engage in the most solemn of deliberations, voting upon new methods of capital raising, with the singular focus of amassing more funds than a certain Mr. Saylor’s enterprise. One might wonder if such pursuits are not akin to chasing shadows, yet here we are. Eric, our young gentleman, has recently assumed the role of advisor to this firm, a position he secured on 21st March 2025, with all the gravitas of a man who has never before encountered the concept of ‘financial prudence.’
As reported by the esteemed Bloomberg, the company’s stock has surged an astonishing 700% over the past year, though it has since waned from its peak in June. One might liken this to a dance with the devil, wherein the devil is both the partner and the prize. Metaplanet, in its folly, has amassed over $2.1 billion in Bitcoin, a sum that would make even the most cautious of investors weep with joy-or horror.
Eric’s recent pilgrimage to the Bitcoin Asia conference in Hong Kong, held on 28th-29th August, was but a prelude to his current venture. The Trump family, ever the paragons of enterprise, has expanded into crypto via World Liberty Financial (WLFI), which has secured a $1.5 billion deal to gather digital tokens from a Las Vegas firm, whose interests lie in biotech and financial tech. One might ask, what could possibly go wrong?
This grand maneuver to dominate the markets of Japan and Hong Kong is part of the Trump family’s grand plan to capitalize on Asia’s burgeoning fascination with cryptocurrency. On 18th August 2025, Japan’s Financial Services Agency (FSA) approved the first Japanese yen-based stablecoin, a decision that signals the nation’s embrace of the digital age-or perhaps its surrender to it. Even Japanese officials, including the venerable Finance Minister Katsunobu Kato, shall grace the WebX2025 crypto event in Tokyo on 25th-26th August, thereby cementing Japan’s status as a hub for digital currencies.
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2025-08-22 17:33