Three Bargain Stocks for a Dying World’s Bull Run

The markets float near their all-time highs like a corpse at a float festival. But even in this charnel house of capitalism, bargains exist. The tech sector, that glittering cathedral of promises, still has vendors hawking wares at discount prices. Let us wander the bazaar. So it goes.

Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing

Taiwan Semiconductor Manufacturing (TSM) has risen 35% this year. Still, its forward P/E ratio sits at 24-a number so low it might as well be printed in invisible ink. This is the company that turns silicon into miracles. Without TSMC, your phone is a paperweight. Your car is a coffin. Your AI dreams? Dust.

They shrink transistors like magicians sawing assistants in half. Competitors fumble at the edges while TSMC marches toward the singularity. Smaller nodes, more power, less energy. The holy trinity of progress. Management claims AI demand will grow 40% annually until 2028. That’s three years before the heat death of the universe, give or take.

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If you want to bet on AI, skip the startups burning cash like incense. Buy the altar upon which the sacrifice occurs. So it goes.

Alphabet

Alphabet (GOOGL) trades at 24 times 2026 earnings. Cheaper than a typewriter in a world of smartphones. The market frets that AI will kill Google Search. But search revenue grows. They sprinkle AI features like breadcrumbs-Circle to Search, AI Overviews-and watch users stumble deeper into the forest.

The Department of Justice tried to strangle their Apple deal. Failed. Chrome still dominates. Android still clings to smartphones like lichen. Most humans access the internet through Google’s throat. They choke on ads.

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Google Cloud grows at 32%. Gemini models hum in data centers, eating electricity and birthing profits. The cloud is just a server someone else owns, but charge enough and it becomes a religion. Alphabet now has its own AI chips. The faithful call them TPUs. The rest of us call it rent.

CEO Sundar Pichai sleeps well. He’s already sold your data. So it goes.

Pinterest

Pinterest (PINS) trades at 16 times earnings. A pittance for a site that monetizes dreams. Revenue grows mid-teens. Margins expand. CEO Bill Ready turned a scrapbook into a shopping mall. Users don’t notice. They’re too busy pinning “inspiration.”

Their AI model recommends wedding dresses and lawn chairs. Automation tools (Performance+) handle ads like a butler managing a meth den. International ARPU jumps 44% in “the rest of the world.” That’s anywhere without Starbucks. Yet.

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Amazon and Instacart partnerships mean users can now shop until their Wi-Fi dies. 578 million monthly users scroll, mostly in places where “emerging” still means “we haven’t ruined it yet.” The valuation? A garage sale price for a company building its own Taj Mahal.

Buy now. Sell before the revolution. So it goes.

We are all investors in the apocalypse. Buy low. Sell lower. 🚀

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2025-09-25 17:17