tag. The literary style should mimic Hunter S. Thompson’s Gonzo journalism-subjective, chaotic, with hyperbole and paranoia. I need to infuse the text with a frantic, high-energy tone. Use CAPITAL LETTERS for emphasis, maybe some profanity, and blur the lines between fact and hallucination. The market watcher angle means I should highlight key financial metrics but present them in a more dramatic, subjective way. First, the title. Original is “Jamison Loads Up on Johnson & Johnson (JNJ) Stock With a 39K Share Purchase”. Thompson’s style would be more sensational. Maybe something like “Jamison’s JNJ Gamble: A 39K Share Stumble in the Wild”. Check character count, under 100. Now, the body. Start with the image tag as is. Then the first paragraph. The original says Jamison disclosed a purchase. Thompson might start with something like “In a move that smells like both genius and madness…” to add that chaotic edge. Use phrases like “batting average” or “wild gamble” to inject humor. Mention the SEC filing as a bureaucratic nightmare. Highlight the numbers but with hyperbolic language-e.g., “$6.76 million feels like a lot when you’re riding the JNJ rollercoaster.” For the trade value, compare it to the fund’s AUM using metaphors like “a pebble in the ocean.” Use all caps for emphasis on key terms like “GONZO INVESTMENT PHILOSOPHY.” In the “What else to know” section, list the top holdings with a snarky comment about them being “safe bets” in a volatile market. Use phrases like “sleeping with the enemy” to add paranoia. The company overview can be transformed into a vivid description of J&J’s operations, likening it to a “mad scientist lab” with a touch of chaos. Mention the dividend yield and stock price with a mix of admiration and skepticism. In the Foolish take, use Thompson’s voice to question the sanity of the investment, comparing the stock’s performance to a “drug-fueled hallucination.” Add a warning about the market’s unpredictability. The glossary terms can be rephrased with a sarcastic tone, making them sound like inside jokes or cryptic warnings. Finally, end with a thematic emoji like 🎩 to nod to Thompson’s iconic hat, placed in the last paragraph. Need to ensure all shortcodes and images are retained, no tags, and the HTML structure is correct. Check that the title is under 100 characters and in the right tag. Avoid any template-like content by rephrasing each section with a unique, chaotic twist. Make sure the humor is understated but idiomatic, fitting Thompson’s style without overdoing it. End of Thought (26.40s) Jamison’s JNJ Gamble: A 39K Share Stumble in the Wild In a move that smells like both genius and madness, Jamison Private Wealth Management has thrown caution to the wind and doubled down on Johnson & Johnson. The SEC filing-submitted on October 14, 2025, like a bureaucratic afterthought-reveals a $6.76 million bet on 39,471 shares. That’s not just money; that’s a middle finger to the algorithmic overlords of the market. Welcome to the circus. The trade? A 0.86% splash in the fund’s AUM pool. Post-purchase, Jamison now clutches 87,545 shares of JNJ, valued at $16.23 million. Let’s not kid ourselves: this isn’t diversification. It’s a high-stakes poker game where the house is also playing. And Johnson & Johnson? The 2.06% stake is enough to make you wonder if the fund’s managers are high on something stronger than coffee. What happened According to the SEC’s latest filing, Jamison Private Wealth Management, Inc. added 39,471 shares of Johnson & Johnson during Q3 2025. Based on the quarter’s average price, this “acquisition” cost $6.76 million. By September 30, 2025, the fund held 87,545 shares. Translation: they’re in deep, and the water’s getting colder by the minute. What else to know This purchase elevates JNJ to 2.06% of the fund’s $789.50 million reportable AUM. The top five holdings? A sad list of tech darlings and financial stalwarts. NVDA ($35.51M), AAPL ($34.23M), MSFT ($33.25M), VMC ($24.17M), and JPM ($17.55M). JNJ, meanwhile, lurks at #8 like a forgotten god in a pantheon of silicon deities. JNJ shares closed at $190.90 on October 13, 2025-a 18.1% climb over the past year. That’s 7.65 percentage points ahead of the S&P 500. But let’s not get carried away. The stock is still 2.86% below its 52-week high, and the dividend yield of 2.70% feels like a pat on the head from a market that’s seen better days. Company overview MetricValueRevenue (TTM)$90.63 billionNet Income (TTM)$22.66 billionDividend Yield2.70%Price (as of market close October 13, 2025)$190.90 Company snapshot Johnson & Johnson is a mad scientist’s lab in a world of corporate sterility. It sells drugs, devices, and consumer products like a one-man band trying to sell tickets to the apocalypse. Its revenue streams are as diverse as a Wall Street executive’s moral compass. But let’s not sugarcoat it: this is a company that’s been through the wringer, spinning off its consumer health division in 2023 like shedding a bad habit. Third-quarter sales rose 6.8% YoY, and management now projects $93.7 billion in 2025 sales. That’s a 5.7% gain-and a 5.7% chance this ship doesn’t sink in a storm. Foolish take Jamison’s JNJ play is either a masterstroke or a cry for help. At 2.06% of AUM, it’s not the fund’s crown jewel-but it’s close enough to smell the perfume of desperation. The stock has outperformed the S&P 500 by 7.65 percentage points this year, which is impressive until you remember that the S&P 500 is basically a retirement home for dying industries. JNJ’s recent gains feel like a drug-fueled hallucination, and the fund’s managers are dancing on a tightrope with a lit match in their hand. The spin-off of the consumer health division was supposed to be a phoenix rising from the ashes. Instead, it’s a phoenix with a mortgage. Sales growth of 6.8% YoY sounds good until you factor in inflation, interest rates, and the looming shadow of regulatory hell. Jamison’s bet is a GONZO INVESTMENT PHILOSOPHY in action-where logic, reason, and fiscal responsibility are optional. Glossary AUM (Assets Under Management): The total value of investments managed by a fund. A number that makes you feel rich until you realize it’s just someone else’s money.13F reportable assets: The SEC’s version of a confession. If you have $100 million in U.S. equities, you’d better file or face the wrath of the alphabet soup agencies.Dividend yield: A reward for holding onto a sinking ship. Or a bribe to keep you from selling.Trailing twelve months (TTM): A 12-month period that always seems to end in disaster.Outperforming the S&P 500: A feat that’s less impressive when the S&P 500 is barely keeping up with inflation.Stake: A claim to ownership, or a ticket to a long, slow burn in the fire of capitalism.Quarter-end: The day accountants turn into warlords, and everyone lies to survive.Reportable AUM: The portion of your assets that the government forces you to confess about. A public humiliation in disguise.Annualized: A lie told by numbers to make you feel like you understand the truth.Top holdings: The investments that keep the fund’s managers awake at night, wondering if they’ve made the right choices-or the wrong ones too late.MedTech: The future of healthcare, if you ignore the fact that it’s run by people who charge $100 for a bandage. And there you have it. The market, as always, is a circus. Sit back, grab a drink, and try not to lose your lunch. 🎩