Stablecoins: Where Tinian Tried, but Palacios Said, “Not Today!” 😂

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So, the governor of the Northern Mariana Islands, a speck of paradise just north of Guam, decided to play the role of the Grinch in April by vetoing a bill that would’ve let Tinian, that little island with about 2,000 sunbathers, launch its own fancy-schmancy USD-pegged stablecoin. Can you imagine? Stablecoins instead of coconuts! 🌴💰

In a letter that could be mistaken for a rejection notice from a dating app, Governor Arnold Palacios pointed out that the bill had “legal issues” and might even be unconstitutional. I mean, who knew stablecoins came with constitutional lawyers? 😂

Palacios nixed the bill primarily because it included a license for internet casinos, aiming to regulate gambling that could wander all over the place—like tourists during happy hour! 🍹 He argued that such activities couldn’t just be kept snug in Tinian’s warm embrace.

Tinian: Almost the First, But Not Quite

If they’d passed this bill, Tinian could have been the first US government to dip its toes in the stablecoin pool ahead of Wyoming! 🏊‍♂️ But alas, Wyoming’s Governor Mark Gordon is twiddling his thumbs while waiting to launch his state’s stablecoin—they must be planning a barbecue or something!

The proposed stablecoin was going to have a snazzy name: Marianas US Dollar (MUSD) and would’ve been more secure than your grandma’s secret cookie recipe. But here’s the kicker, it was to be managed by the Tinian Municipal Treasury, probably while they were also recovering from last night’s karaoke party. 🎤🎉

To add to the charm, local tech outfit Marianas Rai Corporation was lined up to help set this whole thing up, right in the bustling capital of Saipan—great news for tech services, bad news for anyone expecting a smooth launch!

And just when you thought it couldn’t get better, the MUSD was set to launch on the eCash blockchain, not the Bitcoin blockchain, which is kinda like saying we’re riding second-class on a roller coaster but still getting the thrill. 🎢

Just imagine, all this cryptocurrency action was supposed to ride the coattails of Google’s billion-dollar undersea fiber-optic cables. Because nothing says “let’s regulate crypto” quite like a high-speed internet connection! Can we say “lag-free gambling”? 😄

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2025-04-15 09:03