Okay, “safe” stocks. That’s what they call them. As if anything is truly safe. It’s a ridiculous premise, honestly. But fine, people want predictability. They want something that won’t keep them up at night. So, I’ve looked at a few. And I’m not saying these are good stocks, per se. Just…less likely to completely implode. Which, in this market, is a victory.
The whole idea of “safety” is subjective, isn’t it? Everyone’s got their own definition. I look for companies that sell things people absolutely need, even when they’re pinching pennies. Not the latest gadget. Not artisanal coffee. Just…basic stuff. It’s not glamorous, but it’s less likely to disappear overnight. And frankly, I’m tired of being surprised.
1. Motorola Solutions
Motorola Solutions. They make radios. Radios! In 2024! It’s like they’re stuck in a time warp. But, you know what? People need to talk to each other, especially cops and firefighters. Apparently, yelling isn’t effective communication. Who knew? They get about 75% of their revenue from public safety and defense. It’s…stable. Boringly so. They’ve got 13,000 radio networks. 13,000! And 5.5 million security cameras. It’s a surveillance state wrapped in a stock ticker. They even handle 60% of 911 call centers. Which means when you’re having a crisis, you’re talking to them. It’s unsettling, really.
They’re growing, apparently. 8% sales increase in 2025. And free cash flow. Free cash flow! It’s like they’re actively trying to be uninteresting. 30 times FCF. It’s not a steal, but it’s…reliable. Like a beige car. Which, honestly, is a plus these days.
2. Rollins
Rollins. Pest control. Let’s be clear, this is a business built on our collective inability to keep our houses clean. It’s…depressing. But people will always need pest control. Termites don’t care about the economy. Cockroaches don’t negotiate. It’s a non-discretionary service, which is a fancy way of saying “we’re stuck with them.” They’re North America’s leading pest control company. Leading! What does that even mean? More bugs? More chemicals? It’s a horrifying thought.
The market, of course, recognizes this essential service and has slapped a premium valuation on it – 40 times FCF. Of course. Everything good costs too much. They’ve grown sales and FCF by 10% and 14% annually over the last decade. It’s…consistent. Like a dripping faucet. They’ve been acquiring companies for years, a 27-bagger over two decades. It’s impressive, I guess. And they’re down 19% right now. Maybe it’s a good time to buy. Or maybe it’s a trap.
3. Murphy USA
Murphy USA. Gas stations next to Walmarts. A partnership that ended, but the locations remain. It’s…efficient, I suppose. Value-conscious customers. Best-in-class fuel prices. It’s basically catering to people who are actively looking for the cheapest option. Which, again, is depressing. But it’s a business model. They get you in for gas and then try to sell you overpriced snacks and beverages. It’s a racket, frankly. But a successful one.
They’re expanding. 3% annual store growth. More gas stations. Wonderful. Any extra cash goes to stock buybacks and dividend increases. Which is fine, I guess. It’s a 12-bagger since their IPO. A 60% reduction in shares outstanding. They’re buying back shares at a discount. It’s…calculated. Like a chess game played by robots. They’re exceptionally safe. Which, in this world, is the most unsettling thing of all.
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2026-03-24 19:42