Should the inclination to acquire a small portion of this digital coin prove irresistible, there exists, at least, a defensible rationale. However, a more prudent course might be to maintain a judicious reserve, and it is to both arguments that we shall now turn our attention.
This morning brought news that enrollment for their Anktiva therapy exceeded expectations in a trial for non-muscle-invasive bladder cancer. Which, let’s be honest, isn’t a phrase you hear every day. It means they might be able to submit something to the FDA by year’s end. My aunt Mildred has been battling bladder issues for years, and I immediately texted her the news. She responded with a single question: “Will it make me need less ice?” I didn’t have an answer, and frankly, I doubted ImmunityBio did either.
These ETFs, these carefully constructed baskets of shares, promise diversification, a shield against the inevitable storms. They are, in essence, a collective denial of risk, a communal fantasy of stability. And, in fairness, they often deliver. Take, for instance, the Schwab U.S. Dividend Equity ETF (SCHD 0.48%). A respectable specimen, yielding a comfortable 3.8%, a trifle above the general market murmur of 1.1%. Its expense ratio, a mere 0.06%, is almost…modest. One wonders if they aren’t giving the money away. It invests in companies with a certain…sturdiness, a preference for those who reliably generate cash. A sensible, if unimaginative, approach. The problem, of course, is the quarterly distribution. A mere three times a year. For some, that will simply not suffice. They require a monthly drip, a constant reassurance that the machine is still functioning.
But today’s sudden leap – a whopping 19% surge, mind you – wasn’t just about keeping everyone’s thumbs busy. Oh no. It seems these chaps have been handed a rather important job by the very people who worry about things going boom. A national security program, they call it. As of this afternoon, the shares were still bobbing along, up a good 16.8% on the news. Curious, isn’t it, how a bit of government money can make things… perk up?
Look, these Bitcoin miners, they built these massive energy-guzzling facilities. All that hardware, all that electricity… for what? To solve puzzles? It’s just… exhausting to think about. Now, suddenly, it’s “Oh, AI needs data centers! Let’s rent this stuff out!” It’s convenient. Almost too convenient. It’s like admitting defeat, but with a press release.
The consensus, whispered among analysts, suggests a profit of fifty-five cents per share, a respectable increase, perhaps. Revenue, they estimate, will reach eleven billion, nine hundred and seventy million. Numbers. They dance before the eyes, offering the illusion of clarity, while obscuring the deeper, more troubling questions. Will this be enough to satisfy the insatiable appetite of Wall Street? One doubts it.
The firm, you see, is attempting a rather ambitious undertaking: building a constellation of satellites with the intention of beaming internet connectivity directly to one’s mobile telephone. A dashedly clever notion, if I may say so. And, just recently, they’ve received a nod from the U.S. government, granting them permission to bid on contracts for the somewhat mysteriously named “Golden Dome” security system. As of Friday, January 16th, at precisely 12:41 PM EST, the stock was up a respectable 18.6%. A most agreeable state of affairs, wouldn’t you agree?
Cantor Fitzgerald and H.C. Wainwright, those venerable institutions, already held a favorable view of Rezolve AI, predicting prices of $8 and $10 per share, respectively. A quaint notion, really, like predicting the weight of a cloud. Mr. VanVliet of Cantor, a man clearly susceptible to optimism, merely reiterated his ‘Overweight’ rating, citing a strong December and ‘lofty’ 2026 plans. Lofty, indeed. As if plans alone could conjure revenue. He posits that if the company meets its guidance, it will prove retailers crave AI-driven analytics. A rather bold claim, considering the number of retailers currently sustained by nothing more than wishful thinking and strategically placed mannequins. He deems his 12-month target “conservative” in hindsight. A sentiment one might reserve for a particularly small puddle.
The infrastructure is there, built on the backs of miners and the electricity bills of ordinary folk. But the revenue? Still a shadow. They promise it will materialize. Promises are cheap, like the dreams sold to those who believe a machine can solve their problems.
As of the twelfth chime of the clock, Eaton shares have ascended 4.6%. A considerable sum, one might observe, for a company dealing in… well, power and electrical components. A rather prosaic realm, wouldn’t you agree? Yet, the markets, like capricious gods, favor the unexpected.