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Now, here’s a curious thing. According to Polymarket – which, as far as I can gather, is a website where people bet on things, like whether Nvidia will beat expectations – a staggering 95% of those placing wagers believe Nvidia will indeed exceed analyst estimates. Ninety-five percent! That’s the sort of consensus you usually find when asking people if they prefer breathing to not breathing. The current forecast is for earnings per share of $1.52, a perfectly respectable sum, and a 17% increase from last quarter. Nvidia has a habit of doing well, it seems – a bit like a particularly gifted student always acing the exams.

By the hour of one-fifty this day, the stock had shed seven and three-tenths of its value. A substantial loss, though, for those counting pennies, merely a tremor in the grand scheme.

It is a familiar story, isn’t it? A confluence of promises and disappointments. The merger with Cedar Fair, heralded as a synergy of grand proportions, appears to have yielded little beyond increased debt and a certain…stagnation. One observes the numbers – a negative cash flow, a flatlining EBITDA – and is reminded of a grand estate, slowly succumbing to the ravages of time and mismanagement. The refinancing, pushing obligations further into the future, is merely a postponement of the inevitable, a temporary reprieve bought with increasingly onerous terms.

Recent analysis from Bloomberg indicates a diminishing correlation between Apple’s stock performance and that of the Nasdaq-100, reaching its lowest level since 2006. This decoupling suggests a potential for asymmetric performance; should broader technology equities experience downward pressure, Apple may exhibit relative resilience, potentially positioning it as a comparatively safer allocation amidst ongoing concerns regarding a potential correction in AI-related valuations.

Amazon… the name itself has become synonymous with the relentless march of commerce. Yet, even this titan has fallen prey to the prevailing gloom. The stock, a once-unstoppable force, has suffered a decline, a humbling reminder that no empire is eternal. Twelve percent year-to-date… a wound, perhaps, but not necessarily fatal. And to compare it to the S&P 500’s performance last year… a rather pointless exercise in historical accounting. The past, after all, is a phantom, haunting but powerless.

Financial giant Morgan Stanley (MS 4.28%) found itself down 4.3% as of 1:30 p.m. ET, which, in the grand scheme of cosmic events, is hardly noticeable. Though, if you happen to be a shareholder, it may feel disproportionately significant. (It’s all relative, really. Like the size of a planet compared to a dust mite. Or the likelihood of finding a decent cup of tea in outer space.)

Apple, that titan of tempered glass and silicon dreams, had recently delivered numbers that, while impressive to the uninitiated, felt less like a triumph and more like the inevitable unfolding of a carefully orchestrated fate. Fifteen percent growth in revenue, a nearly eighteen percent surge in earnings per share – figures that would have once sparked a frenzy of celebration now seemed merely…expected. The markets, like aging courtesans, demand constant novelty, but Apple, it seemed, had mastered the art of sustaining a legend.

Everyone’s clutching their pearls over some X post – Citrini, they call him – some digital Nostradamus predicting a 2028 apocalypse of unemployment. White-collar casualties, they say. Seventy percent of the GDP tied to consumer spending… it’s a house of cards, people. A beautiful, fragile, utterly doomed house of cards. And the market, predictably, is already reaching for the whiskey.

The aforementioned Baker Bros., having apparently decided that Kymera’s future held more promise than, say, a lifetime supply of sourdough starters, increased their stake in the company. The transaction, valued at approximately $135.45 million (based on Q4 2025 pricing – a period which, in retrospect, seems almost quaintly stable), boosted the fund’s overall Kymera holdings to $297.15 million. This figure, incidentally, is roughly equivalent to the annual GDP of a small, moderately prosperous island nation specializing in the export of decorative seashells. (Don’t ask.)