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The catalyst for this rally is Cantor Fitzgerald’s recent report. Before the market opened this morning, the analyst raised Lucid’s 12-month target from a mere $3 per share to $20 per share. But let us not be misled by the dramatic increase. This surge is, in part, a consequence of the company’s recent 1-for-10 reverse stock split, which artificially inflated the value of each share. Even so, Cantor’s target still suggests a modest 10% upside-an increment that seems lackluster given today’s gains.

Today? Today this digital Prometheus shot up 14% as of 1 p.m. ET, according to the cold-eyed number crunchers at S&P Global Market Intelligence. FOURTEEN PERCENT. That’s not growth; that’s an EVENT. And what fueled this rocket launch into the stratosphere? Their Connected Operations Platform-a Frankensteinian monstrosity stitched together from telematics, safety solutions, site visibility cameras, and more-obliterated analyst expectations faster than a meth-fueled coyote chasing roadrunners across the desert. Revenue surged 30%. THIRTY FUCKING PERCENT.

Prior to the earnings release, analysts had predicted Copart would earn $0.36 per share on revenues of $1.14 billion for the quarter ending July 31. The actual figures painted a slightly different picture: $0.41 per share in earnings, though sales came in just shy at $1.13 billion. These numbers, while not disastrous, seemed to carry with them a faint echo of disappointment, like a song performed beautifully yet missing its final note.

Let us now examine the numbers with the gravity they deserve. Figma’s quarterly revenue grew 46.5% year-over-year – a pace that would make the universe’s expansion blush with inadequacy. Yet here we are, staring at a $26.6 billion market cap built on an annualized $1 billion revenue foundation. It’s like constructing a palace on a foundation of jellybeans and hoping gravity forgets its manners.

But, wait! Just as the plot thickens, Alexandr Wang, Meta’s chief AI officer (because yes, that’s a job title now), squashed the rumor like an unwelcome bug on a touchscreen. He boldly declared, “Any reporting to the contrary is clearly mistaken,” as if Meta hadn’t just sent out invitations to every AI genius in the hemisphere. So, take a deep breath, folks-Meta is not retreating. In fact, it’s doubling down, and the AI rollercoaster is just getting started.

After the curtain fell on Thursday’s trading, Argan unveiled its second-quarter ledger: a fiscal period that ended on July 31, a date that now glimmers with the sheen of irony. The energy-industrial hybrid reported earnings that outpaced Wall Street’s modest ambitions, yet its revenue-a number that should have been a sonnet of prosperity-stumbled, faltering against the bar set by analysts’ calculations. The dissonance between these two numbers is not mere noise; it is the discordant chord of a symphony played on a broken instrument.

In the world of social media, growth is the currency of success, and Snap, despite its once-vibrant history of explosive user numbers, now finds itself facing a more difficult terrain. The company projects 476 million daily active users (DAU) for the third quarter, marking a 7.4% increase from the same time last year. While this is, in itself, a healthy number, it is also a stark contrast to the double-digit growth that once seemed commonplace. The growth is still there, but it is slowing, and there lies the subtle tragedy: the relentless march of progress becomes a crawl. The days when Snap’s user base expanded with such eager vitality now seem like a distant dream, one that we cannot quite remember clearly, yet know was once bright and full of promise.

Here’s the thing about Q2: UiPath coughed up $362 million in revenue, a 14.4% bump that’d make most SaaS zombies weep with joy. Adjusted EPS tripled from $0.04 to $0.15 – which sounds impressive until you realize we’re talking about financial progress from “living in a van” to “studio apartment with roaches.” The real kicker? Annualized recurring revenue’s up 11%, and management’s projecting $1.834B midpoint ARR by year-end. That’s 10.2% growth when you squint right.