But here’s the catch: traditional banks are throwing shade, accusing WLFI and its crypto pals of “bank cosplay” – pretending to be banks without the boring stuff like regulations or accountability. Who needs compliance when you’ve got a Twitter warlord in the Oval Office? 🤡
Ah, the announcement! A grand unveiling of FTAI Power, a new enterprise that promises to transform the humble CFM56 engines into something akin to mighty turbines, capable of bestowing the world with an abundance of reliable energy for its ravenous data centers. What a delightfully absurd image-a turbine, once confined to the realm of aviation, now cavorting about the globe, fulfilling the very whims of artificial intelligence (AI) as it burgeons like a wildflower after a rain.
Налейте себе водки, зажгите сигарету и приготовьтесь к разбору – тут не чистые игры, а схватки за души и деньги. MSCI, словно шутник на сцене, решил устранить автоматическую покупку акций MSTR – и хотя на первый взгляд кажется, что всё проиграно, в глубине души слышен хохот старого ворона, ведь рынок всё еще не сдался. Кому нужны алгоритмы, когда есть Макс Кизер с его остротой и сарказмом?💥
In a move that could only be described as “defi-antly ambitious,” Owlto Finance, a protocol claiming to connect blockchains faster than a caffeinated squirrel, launched its native token, $OWL. This little wonder aims to be the engine powering what it charmingly calls its “cross-chain ecosystem” – because apparently, traditional chains are so last century.
Back then, a sudden gulp in USDT or USDC supply looked bearish-as if the market had decided to lock the doors and hide under the bed. In plain English: more stablecoins = folks buffering their feelings, not actually deploying cash. 🤷♀️
Ah, the joys of predictability! Crypto guru Dave pointed out that it now takes a staggering 25 days and 4 hours to get your turn to stake, up from a breezy 7.5 days. Meanwhile, exiting? Less than 15 minutes. That’s right, a quick escape from staking hell while getting stuck in entry limbo for weeks. The result? A rollercoaster of the staking experience-more uncertainty than a weather forecast. So basically, you’re gambling with your ETH, praying it doesn’t take an eternity just to get in or out. 🤹♂️
Bull Holdco L.P. and Bull Co-Invest L.P., entities that exist somewhere between B2B and Bizarro World. The insider remains a direct-shareless specter, their ownership maintained through the Looking Glass of Limited Partnerships.
Josh Swihart, the ECC CEO, took to the digital town square (X, as it is now called) to proclaim that his team was “constructively discharged.” A phrase as dramatic as it is legal, it implies that the Bootstrap board, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit, had imposed conditions so intolerable that resignation was the only honorable exit. One cannot help but imagine the board members-Zaki Manian, Christina Garman, Alan Fairless, and Michelle Lai-as characters in a tragicomedy, their actions misaligned with Zcash’s original mission, according to Swihart.
Retail investors are currently dancing the cha-cha with AI stocks, while Warren Buffett, that grumpy old bear in the corner of the ballroom, is hoarding cash like a Scrooge with a side hustle. The CORP-DEPO’s 2026 AI Investor Outlook Report claims 90% of retail investors plan to buy or hold AI stocks this year. Meanwhile, Berkshire Hathaway (BRK.A 0.40%) (BRK.B 0.53%) has been trimming positions and stockpiling $381.7 billion in cash. Buffett’s favorite hobby? Not investing.
The meteoric rise is largely attributed to a staggering 694% uptick in funds funneled to those oh-so-lucky sanctioned entities, heralding, according to our dear Chainalysis, a bold new epoch of “large-scale nation-state antics” within the shadowy realm of crypto crime. Who knew evading sanctions could be such a lucrative hobby? 💰
