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The cause, whispered amongst the brokers, is a forecast. Not a prophecy etched in the stars, mind you, but a rather mundane prediction that profits shall not entirely dissolve into the ether. They anticipate reaching the upper echelons of their own projections – a feat akin to a bureaucrat discovering an unclaimed form. The stock, naturally, responded as if presented with a lifetime supply of pickled herring.

The source of this discomfiture? UnitedHealth Group, it appears, has suffered a most grievous disappointment in its recent pronouncements, prompting a decline of some twenty percent. A harsh judgment, to be sure, but one that serves as a potent reminder: even the most imposing structures can be brought low by a misstep. This misfortune, naturally, dragged the Dow along with it, a cautionary tale of interconnectedness. One might observe that a market index weighted by price, such as the Dow, is prone to such dramatic swings – a rather clumsy mechanism, if you ask me.

It’s secured deals with the likes of Microsoft and Meta, which is, admittedly, a good sign. Everyone likes being associated with the big boys. But Nebius operates a rather limited number of data centers – one actually owned, the rest leased. Expanding that footprint requires, shall we say, a significant outlay of capital. Analysts foresee losses, and when analysts foresee losses, one tends to listen. It’s a bit like building a magnificent castle on a foundation of hope and borrowed money. It might work, but one wouldn’t necessarily want to be holding the mortgage.

I’ve been eyeing two in particular: Microsoft (MSFT +2.23%) and Alphabet (GOOG +0.40%) (GOOGL +0.40%). They’re, like, everywhere. Billions of people are using their stuff daily. Which means, shockingly, they’re making a bit of money. And they’re smart enough to reinvest it. Which, frankly, is more than I can say for most people I know.

The problem isn’t that Lucid can’t build a car. They make perfectly fine EVs, apparently. People in the auto industry give them little pats on the back. But building a car and running a business? Two different universes. Lucid has been losing a lot of money. And they keep going back to the same well for more. Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund. They’re good for a loan, those Saudis. A very, very large loan.

But don’t despair. Because while one technological behemoth appears to be navigating a particularly dense patch of space-time, another is quietly positioning itself for, well, not necessarily dominance, but a comfortably advantageous orbit. We’re talking about Qualcomm. A name that, for many, still conjures images of mobile phones. Which is a bit like judging a planet by its weather. They do rather more than just facilitate conversations and cat videos, you know.

The filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission reveals this increase in Kinetik Holdings shares. One wonders, naturally, what prompted such enthusiasm. Perhaps a particularly persuasive lunch? Or merely a desperate attempt to deploy capital before the inevitable correction?

For the last few years, the problem with building these ‘thinking machines’ – what the youngsters call ‘Artificial Intelligence’ – wasn’t a lack of cleverness, but a lack of bricks. Specifically, graphics processing units, those shiny, power-hungry things made by Nvidia and AMD. They were the engines, and everything ground to a halt if you couldn’t get enough of them. But the world, as it always does, is getting complicated.

And the culprit? Not geopolitical tensions. Not a rogue swarm. Nope. It was… paperwork. Seriously.