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Observe, if you will, the current tableau. As of late winter’s chill, these three companies boast the most generous yields within the Nasdaq-100. But, as any seasoned investor – or, indeed, any astute observer of human nature – knows, a high yield is not always a sign of prosperity. It may, rather, be a desperate plea for attention, a masked attempt to disguise underlying weakness. Let us proceed with caution, and a healthy dose of skepticism.

The trading volume—115 million shares, a figure bordering on the infinite—suggests a collective delusion, a momentary convergence of hope and speculation. It is as if investors, like characters in a Borges story, are chasing their own reflections in a hall of mirrors, each believing they possess a unique insight into the future. The company, established in 2007—a mere blink in the geological timescale of commerce—has experienced a growth of 3,754% since its inception. A statistic that, upon closer inspection, reveals less about the inherent value of the enterprise and more about the peculiar logic of exponential curves.

Advanced Micro Devices experienced a most considerable setback, declining 17.31% to close at $200.19. One observes a curious phenomenon: while the company’s earnings were, by most accounts, satisfactory, the market appeared to hold expectations of a rather more exuberant performance. A disappointment, certainly, though not entirely unexpected in a sphere given to such volatility.

The broader market mirrored this disquiet. The S&P 500 descended 0.51% to 6,882, while the Nasdaq Composite suffered a more pronounced decline of 1.51%, settling at 22,905. Within the realm of transportation, the contagion spread. Lyft, a fellow traveler in this precarious industry, fell 3.58% to $16.16. DoorDash, another dependent on the whims of demand, experienced a 3.05% reduction, closing at $195.83. It is a collective sigh, a quiet acknowledgement of vulnerabilities within this supposedly innovative sector.

Alphabet, the sprawling empire born from a garage and a search for order in the chaos of knowledge, announced its earnings. The numbers, as they always do, told a story, though one often obscured by the language of analysts and the frantic pulse of the market. Revenue climbed, a respectable 18% increase, to $113.8 billion – a sum that could, if distributed evenly, buy a small kingdom, or at least a very large server farm. Earnings per share, a more elusive metric, soared 31% to $2.82, exceeding the expectations of those who traffic in such predictions. But it was the cloud, that ethereal realm of stored data and boundless computation, that truly captured the attention, rising a robust 48% to $17.7 billion. A growth rate that suggests a vessel gaining speed, charting a course towards a horizon still veiled in mist.

Apparently, Advanced Micro Devices (AMD) suggested things might…slow down a tiny bit in 2026. A sequential decline, they called it. Five percent. Five! As if five percent is the end of the world. It’s enough to send everyone into a frenzy, of course. It’s always something.

UnitedHealth Group, a giant among health insurers, has lately been drawing that kind of scrutiny. A solid company, yes, but one weathering a storm of rising costs, a decline mirrored in the price of its shares. Still, a yield of 3% is a beacon in these times, when the average S&P 500 offering barely crests 1%. It’s a lure for those seeking income, a small harbor in a restless sea. But is that yield secure? That’s the question that keeps a man awake at night.

One is compelled to ask: was this expected? The quarterly reports, replete with figures of growth, possessed a seductive logic. Revenue ascended, profits bloomed, and the rate of increase itself accelerated. Yet, to focus solely on these metrics is to navigate a labyrinth with eyes fixed only on the immediate turn, neglecting the broader architecture. A valuation of 222 times earnings demands a scrutiny beyond mere increment; it demands a cartography of potential decline.

Let’s break it down. DRAM is your short-term memory – what your computer uses to, you know, compute. NAND is long-term storage, like the digital equivalent of your aunt Mildred’s photo albums. Both are currently experiencing a supply situation so tight, it makes getting Hamilton tickets look easy. And it’s all because of AI’s insatiable appetite.

Units of BSX Sold in Moment of Weakness: 25. Deeply Regretted: Immediately. Hours Spent Refreshing Portfolio: 6. Attempts to Rationalize Decision: 14.