Non‑plucky Adam Back, the CEO of BSTR, admits the plunge in bitcoin and the even deeper dive for crypto treasury firms could still mean an IPO as early as April. He’s basically saying, “I’ll make it happen-no fireworks guaranteed.”
The analysts, those brilliant seers of the financial world, predicted a loss of a penny a share on $182 million in sales. ACV? They managed $183.6 million! A win! A glorious, fleeting win! But then… they lost 11 cents a share. Eleven! It’s like they were trying to disappoint Wall Street. Honestly, it’s almost impressive.
The reasons, as always, are layered, a tangle of anxieties and miscalculations. The initial tremors stemmed from the absurd panic surrounding artificial intelligence – a bubble, they called it. A bubble! As if the relentless march of calculation and data processing were some transient fancy. NuScale, positioned to power these digital behemoths with its small modular reactors, became a casualty of this irrational fear. Oklo and Nano Nuclear Energy suffered alongside, victims of a collective hysteria. It’s a curious thing, how easily the promise of progress can be overshadowed by the specter of its potential excess.
Recently, this discerning gentleman decided Meta Platforms (NASDAQ: META) wasn’t worth the weight in goblin gold, and instead, piled into Amazon (AMZN +1.62%). A curious move, like trading a slightly tarnished crown for a slightly dented bucket. But then, the market rarely operates on logic, preferring instead to be driven by rumour, fear, and the occasional burst of irrational exuberance.
The soothsayers – or ‘analysts,’ as they prefer to be called – predicted a paltry penny and change per share, with sales amounting to $327.6 million. Kratos, however, came in with eighteen cents a share and $345.1 million in sales. A victory, you’d think? Well, hold your horses.
Seriously, though, is Wall Street having a collective panic attack, or is there actual cause for concern? Let’s unpack this, because honestly, I need a new stock to obsess over, and this one’s got potential. Or at least, a good story.
They have a lot of these things, Vanguard. Over a hundred, which seems…excessive. Like a bakery with a hundred different types of sourdough. Eventually, some are going to get lost in the shuffle. Forgotten, left to stale on the shelf. And that, I suspect, is what’s happened with the Vanguard U.S. Minimum Volatility ETF. VFMV, they call it. Sounds like a particularly uninspired license plate.
Look, I’m a patient guy. Relatively. But this whole “rewarding patience” angle… it’s insulting. Like we’re all supposed to be grateful for… mediocrity? I’ve been diversified, yes, because that’s what responsible investors do. But to be “rewarded” now? It feels like a participation trophy. And I don’t do participation trophies.
Tuesday saw the poor beast dragged through the mud, hitting a low of $62,525 per coin on Bitstamp. $156 million in long positions, those hopeful bets on a rise, were swept away like so much dry grass in a prairie fire. Bitcoin liquidations led the charge, accounting for the lion’s share of the $400 million erased from the derivatives market. It’s been a brutal season, with the coin down 7.5% this week and a staggering 29.2% over the past month. Folks are starting to whisper, is this the end of the ‘digital gold’ dream?
Alphabet. Google, if you’re not keeping score. They won a lawsuit, you know. The government said they were a monopoly. The judge agreed, sort of. Didn’t really do anything about it. So it goes. They also have this “Gemini” thing, an AI that’s supposed to be clever. It does search results. People still use Google. Shocking.