You Won’t Believe What Russia Just Said About the US Dollar at BRICS! 😱💸

It’s all getting rather awkward for the almighty dollar, which—like a party guest who just spilled red wine on the host’s cream rug—appears to be losing its “safe and stable” vibes. Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov (waving his best ‘I told you so’ finger) insisted at the BRICS summit in Rio that the U.S. might want to notice fewer people are fangirling over the dollar these days. As Lavrov gleefully pointed out, even Donald Trump had beef with Joe Biden for, allegedly, torching the dollar’s reputation before even moving his boxes into the White House. Lavrov, never one to let drama pass un-commented, quipped:

🚨 Ethereum’s Sleeping Beauties Wake Up 🚨

These two wallets, starting with “0x27” and “0x7f” (yeah, real catchy names), were created back in the day when Ethereum was still in its “Frontier” phase. They got their initial Ether from some “GENESIS” transactions, which is just a fancy way of saying they were part of the cool kids’ club from the very beginning. 🤓

China’s Shenzhen Warns: Stablecoin Scams Are the New Ponzi Schemes! 🚨💰

A Chinese task force, tasked with the noble mission of combating illicit financial activities, has warned Shenzhen residents to be wary of fraudulent investment projects that prey on the public’s limited understanding of stablecoins. In an alert issued on July 7, the Shenzhen Municipal Task Force Office for Preventing and Combating Illegal Financial Activities suggested that fraudsters are increasingly targeting stablecoins, thanks to the widespread attention these digital wonders have garnered recently. 🤑

Russian Tax Men Peer into the Crypto Mines: Miners, Hide Your Ledgers!

Ivan Chebeskov, an official of the Finance Ministry—whose job apparently involves pushing paperwork into infinity—declared with a straight face that despite new laws being drawn up with all the panache of a Tolstoy novel, less than a third of miners have actually bothered to write their names on this fabled directory. One must admire the Russian miner’s dedication to both electricity consumption and administrative evasion. ⚡️💸

Ethereum Eyes $3,500 as Vitalik’s Gas Fee Proposal Sends Whales Back Into the Pool

Ethereum is currently hovering around $2,533, comfortably sitting above the ever-important psychological support at $2,500. This, dear reader, is what one might call “stability,” if one is into that sort of thing. And to make the scene even juicier, trading volume has shot up by over 70%, reaching a staggering $15.14 billion, according to market trackers. Apparently, the market has had too much coffee and is feeling quite chipper.

A Real Estate Firm’s Foray into the Cryptic World of Bitcoin

The firm has entered into a standby equity purchase agreement (SEPA) worth up to $500 million, with the proceeds to be used “primarily” to invest in BTC, as stated in a press release. This strategic move is not without its critics, but Murano remains steadfast in its belief that bitcoin is a transformative asset, one that offers long-term growth potential and serves as a bulwark against inflation and systemic risk. 🛡️📈