“Vols remain pinned near historical lows, but a decisive breach of the $110k resistance could spark a renewed volatility bid. Some larger players appear to be positioning for just that,” Singapore-based QCP Capital remarked in a market update, with a tone that might suggest a hint of amusement at the market’s predictable unpredictability. 😄
Schwartz, harbinger of digital fog and Chief Technology Officer of Ripple, stunned the trembling community with his admission—he snuck into XRP not at a price of $0.50 (as self-congratulating nostalgia hoarders fondly recalled), but at an obscenely low $0.006. Six-tenths of a cent! Even vending machines wept with envy.
This has, inevitably, set the forums aflame, with speculation, admiration, and the odd accusation that Schwartz himself might actually be Satoshi’s long-lost cousin. But let’s be clear: the man opted for a humble salary and a dainty 2% crumb of equity, not the glimmering vaults others chased like hungry Dostoevskian misfits. He will not tell you how much XRP he hoarded or holds. Mystery, apparently, pays dividends.
Never one to shy from poetic repetition, Schwartz also reminded the world that his father (of course, there is always a cryptic father) bagged a million XRP at the princely sum of $0.005 back in 2014. The timing, it seems, proves that familial clairvoyance runs in the Schwartz bloodline.
It’s all getting rather awkward for the almighty dollar, which—like a party guest who just spilled red wine on the host’s cream rug—appears to be losing its “safe and stable” vibes. Russian Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov (waving his best ‘I told you so’ finger) insisted at the BRICS summit in Rio that the U.S. might want to notice fewer people are fangirling over the dollar these days. As Lavrov gleefully pointed out, even Donald Trump had beef with Joe Biden for, allegedly, torching the dollar’s reputation before even moving his boxes into the White House. Lavrov, never one to let drama pass un-commented, quipped:
Software intelligence firm Microstrategy (Nasdaq: MSTR), which has rebranded as Strategy, announced on July 7 that it launched a $4.2 billion at-the-market (ATM) offering of its 10.00% Series A Perpetual Stride Preferred Stock (STRD Stock). The company stated:
While the price stays up, the volume, a key factor in trading, is drying up like a mirage in the Sahara. 🏜️
These two wallets, starting with “0x27” and “0x7f” (yeah, real catchy names), were created back in the day when Ethereum was still in its “Frontier” phase. They got their initial Ether from some “GENESIS” transactions, which is just a fancy way of saying they were part of the cool kids’ club from the very beginning. 🤓
A Chinese task force, tasked with the noble mission of combating illicit financial activities, has warned Shenzhen residents to be wary of fraudulent investment projects that prey on the public’s limited understanding of stablecoins. In an alert issued on July 7, the Shenzhen Municipal Task Force Office for Preventing and Combating Illegal Financial Activities suggested that fraudsters are increasingly targeting stablecoins, thanks to the widespread attention these digital wonders have garnered recently. 🤑
Ivan Chebeskov, an official of the Finance Ministry—whose job apparently involves pushing paperwork into infinity—declared with a straight face that despite new laws being drawn up with all the panache of a Tolstoy novel, less than a third of miners have actually bothered to write their names on this fabled directory. One must admire the Russian miner’s dedication to both electricity consumption and administrative evasion. ⚡️💸
Ethereum is currently hovering around $2,533, comfortably sitting above the ever-important psychological support at $2,500. This, dear reader, is what one might call “stability,” if one is into that sort of thing. And to make the scene even juicier, trading volume has shot up by over 70%, reaching a staggering $15.14 billion, according to market trackers. Apparently, the market has had too much coffee and is feeling quite chipper.
The firm has entered into a standby equity purchase agreement (SEPA) worth up to $500 million, with the proceeds to be used “primarily” to invest in BTC, as stated in a press release. This strategic move is not without its critics, but Murano remains steadfast in its belief that bitcoin is a transformative asset, one that offers long-term growth potential and serves as a bulwark against inflation and systemic risk. 🛡️📈
