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In the annals of a Reuters report, there emerged speculation that orforglipron, a nascent contender in the realm of obesity treatment, might find its way to the hallowed halls of the FDA’s approval before the year’s end. Though uncertainty lingers like a fog on a quiet morning, optimism permeated among those keeping watch over Eli Lilly’s fortunes.

The market’s enthusiasm was, to be fair, somewhat understandable. One announcement detailed a potential successor to Wegovy, the drug that’s turned obesity into a lucrative niche for the company. The other suggested that Wegovy might do more than just melt away pounds-it might also help people stop thinking about cake. (A development so profound it could rival the invention of the tea bag.)

Shares of AeroVironment (AVAV) were up 5% by 3:30 p.m. ET, because nothing says “confidence” like a stock price that dances like it’s in a Fred Astaire movie. Investors, it seems, are twirling with delight.

Ferguson’s Q4 revenue swelled 6.9% year-over-year to $8.5 billion, a number that, in the grand scheme of things, is roughly as impressive as a teapot orbiting Saturn. Adjusted earnings per share leapt from $2.98 to $3.48-a 17% increase that would have made a 1920s stockbroker weep with nostalgia. Analysts, those modern-day oracles of spreadsheets, had penciled in earnings near $3.29 on $8.7 billion in revenue. Ferguson’s results, therefore, were a masterclass in statistical sleight of hand: just enough to satisfy, just enough to confuse, and absolutely nothing to write home about-unless your home is a server farm in Nebraska.

Curiously, Jumia did not unfurl any banners or issue proclamations of newfound glory, but rather, it basked in the warm glow cast by an unexpected and monumental raising of its price target from the smartly dressed financial establishments. The market, like a sun-baked field awaiting rain, embraced this change.