Yet, herein lies the farce: these corpulent whales of the ether are divesting themselves with all the pomp of an aristocratic divorce, just as Ether teeters near a key resistance. Sarcasm aside, they scent profit in the air and sell, sell, sell! 😏
In the immortal words of every cautious chap at the club: “It might.” If the whole financial privacy song and dance continues, expect more fireworks. But for now, don’t be surprised if it takes a little breather-because what’s a rally without a spot of drama, eh?
Yet let us not mistake the rustling branches for the end of the forest. Oracle’s remaining performance obligations-$455 billion-stand like a mountain range of gold, a promise of revenue stretching into the next decade. It is a sum so vast it could drown a lesser company in its own ambition. But Oracle, like a river carving through stone, has turned this deluge into a blueprint for survival.
The stock’s 30-day leap didn’t just top the S&P 500-it added $19 billion to its market cap, making the New York-based studio worth more than a few billion dollars. A figure so large, it could fund a sequel to every movie ever made… if only they had the bandwidth.
The 61,000 Bitcoin in question, now worth more than a dozen luxury yachts and a side of moon rocks, was snatched from some enterprising crooks in 2018. These villains, bless their little fraud hearts, had swindled 128,000 Chinese investors outta their life savings. Now, the UK’s Treasury is whispering behind closed doors, “What if we squirrel this cash away to plug our budget hole?”-as if the British taxpayer ain’t already subsidizing the Royal Family’s tea parties. 🫖👑
Observe, if you will, the cyclical pantomime of Bitcoin’s quarterly performances. Historically, the fourth act-nay, the final quarter-has proven most profitable, with an average gain of 85% since the days of yore (2013). In 2020, it soared 168% like a phoenix reborn; in 2017, a 215% surge left even the most stoic traders agog. And let us not forget 2013’s 480% explosion, a veritable fireworks display of financial alchemy.
The company’s fate was written in the margins, those narrow slivers of profit that clung to its balance sheet like ivy to a crumbling wall. Gross margins, the difference between the price of a house and the cost of its repairs, renovations, and the ghosts of its past owners, had dwindled to 8.2% of revenue-a number as fragile as a spiderweb in a storm. Even as interest rates dipped and the economy hummed with the faint buzz of recovery, Opendoor’s coffers bled. Its recent quarter had seen $128 million in gross profit, a pittance compared to the $129 million of the year prior, despite a 4% rise in revenue. The math was a riddle: more sales, less profit. A paradox as old as the desert itself.
The cast of this act? Billionaires, hedge funds, and the occasional government official, all drawn to the shimmering promise of qubits and the faint hope of outpacing the market’s next crash. In the second quarter, Citadel, Tudor, and Two Sigma-names as grand as the palaces of Versailles-began piling into Rigetti’s chariot, their wallets clinking like the chandeliers of a Parisian opera house.
Mr. Tyler, with his charts, has revealed the community’s inclination towards sixty dollars; a sum which seems to have captured their imaginations. The price, after a rather undignified tumble, is now forming what one might term ‘higher lows’ – a most encouraging sign, and one which aligns conveniently with their aspirations. Such harmony between opinion and observation often breeds a momentum most agreeable when buying spirits are revived. 😊
Once considered a golden ticket for investors, Lululemon has recently taken them on quite a rollercoaster ride. If you had the audacity to invest $1,000 in Lululemon five years ago, you might now be raising a perplexed eyebrow at just how far the stock has plummeted.
