Now they’re fiddling with stablecoins. These are supposed to be cryptocurrencies that don’t… fluctuate. Tied to real money, or something. A new federal law, the Genius Act, gives them a framework. Because everything needs a framework. Last July, 27% of Americans had bought something with these digital pennies. Millennials were higher, at 34%. They like the speed, apparently. 60% said they’d use them for shopping. As if shopping is the answer to anything.
Fourth quarter net sales were down 1.5% year-over-year. Full year? Down 1.7%. Look, it’s not a parade, but it was roughly in line with expectations. Which, in corporate speak, means “we knew it would be bad, but we’re pretending to be surprised.” The interesting part is the 2026 projection. They’re predicting a 2% net sales growth. Two percent! That’s like getting a participation trophy in a competitive eating contest. Still, it’s a direction, and in this market, direction is everything.
The fourth quarter of 2025 saw Gilder Gagnon’s Duolingo holdings diminish, a reduction compounded by the stock’s own independent decline. The fund’s total exposure to this purveyor of digital tongues decreased by a rather substantial $95.44 million – a figure encompassing both the sale and the stock’s rather precipitous tumble. One might almost suspect the algorithms themselves are staging a revolt.
This foray into golf-related equities constitutes 2.14% of Claar Advisors’ U.S. holdings, a figure which, while not negligible, hardly signals a seismic shift in investment strategy. Their more substantial commitments remain, predictably, to the ubiquitous index trackers (ITOT, at a rather imposing $147.89 million), and the tech behemoths – Google, Amazon, Microsoft – those reliable purveyors of modern distraction. One imagines the golf shares are intended to provide a touch of colour, a whimsical counterpoint to the relentless march of algorithmic trading.
On the 13th of February, 2026, Kettle Hill disclosed the acquisition of 1,716,381 shares in SentinelOne. A sum of $25.75 million, they tell us. A perfectly respectable amount, though one wonders if the funds weren’t diverted from a more sensible investment – perhaps a small vineyard in the Crimea? No, no, I digress. The stake now represents 5.74% of Kettle Hill’s 13F reportable AUM. A significant commitment, or a desperate gamble? The answer, naturally, depends on who you ask – and how much vodka they’ve consumed.
The SEC filing from February 17th confirms it. They offloaded everything. Zero percent of their 13F assets now tied up in Varonis. Which, if you’re keeping score, is a rather definitive statement. They’ve reallocated that money to things like APLD, MTZ, DAVE, FIX, and KTOS. The usual suspects. I’ve seen those names before. They’re all…reliably boring. Which, honestly, is what you want. Reliable boredom is the holy grail of portfolio management.
Nvidia is, undeniably, having a moment. A big moment. The numbers are frankly a bit dizzying. But here’s the thing about dizzying numbers. They often imply a certain… precariousness. Like a very tall stack of pancakes. Delicious, yes, but also likely to end in a sticky mess. The latest reports were, shall we say, enthusiastic. Revenue jumped 65% year over year to $215.9 billion. Astounding net income of $120 billion. It’s all very impressive, but also makes me slightly anxious. Is it sustainable? That’s the question. And I’m not sure anyone truly knows.
The market, naturally, has taken notice. And where the market leads, speculation – and, occasionally, fortune – is sure to follow. We find ourselves, therefore, observing three companies attempting to tame this quantum beast: D-Wave Quantum, IonQ, and Quantum Computing Inc.. Each approaches the challenge with a distinct philosophy, and each, I suspect, harbors a secret hope of becoming the Rothschild of the quantum age.
The current market gossip places silver at a modest $81.98 per ounce, darling. Yes, it’s been a tad wobbly, swinging between $81 and $85 like a socialite at a cocktail party. But fear not! Short-term positioning is as fickle as a Coward protagonist, and silver is holding on with all the tenacity of a debutante clutching her first invitation to the season.
The so-called experts, those who fancy themselves seers of the financial future, were anticipating a rather humdrum showing. They figured earnings would slip from a paltry 19 cents to a mere 18, and revenue would creep along at a 5.7% increase. A gentle breeze, if you will.