Oklo: A Risky Reactor, Actually

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So, everybody’s talking about alternative energy. Fine. Good. It’s not like we have a surplus of perfectly good, non-polluting power just lying around. But the way they talk about it… like it’s some grand, unified concept. It’s always “clean energy,” “sustainable solutions”… as if those words actually mean something specific. And then there’s Oklo. Nuclear, but…small. Small nuclear. Like that’s supposed to make me feel better.

This Oklo, they’re trying to build these little reactors. Modular, they call them. Sounds…fragile. Like an Ikea bookshelf. One wrong move and the whole thing collapses. And the Department of Energy is giving them money? Our money? For this? It’s like they’re running a science fair and we’re all paying for the glitter glue. They got three out of eleven projects funded. Three! That’s statistically…something. I don’t know what. Probably nothing good.

They broke ground on something in Idaho. Aurora, of all places. What is it with these companies and remote locations? Like they’re hiding something. And this “Atomic Alchemy” site… honestly, the names. It’s just… much. Supply chain shortages? Like that’s a new problem? Every single industry has supply chain issues. It’s the human condition at this point.

So, five years ago, someone could have put a thousand dollars into this… venture. A thousand dollars. I mean, you could have bought a decent used couch for that. Or a year’s worth of really good coffee. But no, they decided to gamble it on miniature nuclear reactors. And apparently, it paid off. Of course.

A Return That’s…Annoying

Look, I get it. People like a good return. But the whole thing just feels…off. It’s a bet on something that might work, in a future where everything goes exactly as planned. And when does that ever happen? It’s like investing in a restaurant that only serves artisanal toast. A niche market, to say the least.

According to this chart—which, let’s be honest, is probably manipulated somehow—a thousand dollars five years ago would now be worth over six thousand five hundred. 558% return. It’s obscene. And it’s beating the market, apparently. Which just means the market is even more irrational than I thought. It’s like everyone decided to collectively ignore all the warning signs and just throw money at tiny nuclear reactors. What is happening?

I’m not saying it’s a bad investment. I’m just saying… it’s unsettling. It’s like the universe is playing a joke on me. A very expensive, potentially radioactive joke. And honestly, I’m starting to suspect the coffee. It’s just…different lately.

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2026-02-18 20:42