Millionaire Dreams & Tech Stocks

Right. So, the portfolio. It’s… a work in progress. Honestly, a bit like my attempts at mindfulness. Lots of good intentions, occasional flashes of brilliance, mostly just a lot of frantic checking. But, you know, one has to try. And right now, “trying” involves staring at tech stocks. Specifically, the ones that might, just might, allow me to afford a small island somewhere. Or at least a decent renovation.

There’s been talk, you see. About companies that have, well, done rather well. Nvidia, for example. Apparently, it’s gone up something ridiculous – 800% in three years. I mean, seriously? I barely manage 8% on a good hair day. And then there’s Palantir. Another one. Climbing, climbing, climbing. It all sounds terribly exciting, but also slightly terrifying. Like being on a rollercoaster designed by someone who’s never actually experienced gravity.

The thing is, I’ve decided I need a plan. A proper plan. Not just “buy low, sell high” – which, frankly, feels a bit simplistic. I need to identify the next big thing. The companies that are going to make me rich. Or at least, less poor. So, I’ve been doing some research. And two names keep cropping up. CoreWeave and IonQ. Let’s see if they measure up. (Units of Cryptocurrency Lost: 3. Hours Spent Reading White Papers: 7. Number of Times I’ve Considered Becoming a Beekeeper Instead: 5).

1. CoreWeave

CoreWeave. Sounds… intense. Apparently, they’re all about capacity. Which, as far as I can gather, is what AI needs. Lots and lots of it. It’s like feeding a very hungry beast. They rent out graphics processing units – GPUs – to people who need them. It’s like a fancy computer rental service. Clever, really. And it seems to be working. Revenue has doubled, apparently. Doubled! I haven’t doubled anything in years. (Except maybe my caffeine intake.) It’s all very promising. But, of course, there’s always a risk. (Risk Assessment Score: 6/10. Mostly because I don’t fully understand it.)

They seem to be specialists in this whole AI thing. Which is good. I mean, you wouldn’t want your plumber trying to perform brain surgery, would you? (Except maybe if they had a really good YouTube tutorial.) So, if AI keeps growing – and everyone seems to think it will – CoreWeave could do very well indeed. (Potential Island Budget Increase: $5,000.)

2. IonQ

IonQ. Even the name sounds futuristic. They’re pioneers in quantum computing. Which, if I’m being honest, sounds like something out of a science fiction film. It involves subatomic particles and… well, I’m not entirely sure what it involves. Something about qubits scaling exponentially. It’s all very complicated. (Brain Cell Count After Attempting to Understand Quantum Physics: Decreasing.) But apparently, it could solve problems that are currently impossible. Which is… impressive. They use trapped ions. Apparently, that’s a good thing. Something about accuracy and computing for longer periods. It all sounds very technical. And slightly terrifying.

They’re a “pure play” quantum company. Which means they’re all in on this whole quantum thing. Which is either very brave or very foolish. They’re still working towards developing a generally useful quantum computer. Which, let’s be honest, could take a while. (Estimated Time Until Functional Quantum Computer: Unknown. Possibly Never.) But if they succeed… well, the potential gains could be enormous. (Potential Island Budget Increase: $50,000. Contingent on actual quantum breakthrough.)

So, there you have it. CoreWeave and IonQ. Two tech stocks that might just help me achieve my millionaire dreams. Or, you know, at least afford a slightly nicer coffee machine. It’s a long shot, of course. But, as they say, you have to be in it to win it. (Number of Times I’ve Said “I’m an Investor” to Sound More Sophisticated: 17. Number of Times I’ve Actually Felt Like an Investor: 3.) And, frankly, staring at charts is far more entertaining than doing my taxes.

2026-02-05 12:12

1. CoreWeave

2. IonQ

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