In the shadow of market tempests, Strategy pressed onward, its soul entwined with the cold embrace of Bitcoin, adding 397 to its hoard-a Sisyphus of digital gold, condemned to roll its cryptographic boulder uphill, again and again 🧠💸.
The company, in its infinite wisdom, divested $69.5 million of its mortal stock to fund a $45.6 million ritual, purchasing BTC at the oracle’s price of $114,771. A paradox! To sell shares to buy a currency that scoffs at the very notion of shares. The irony, it burns! 🔥
sell stock to buy Bitcoin to prop up… the stock? A ouroboros of fiscal masochism. 🐍
Roughly $54.4 million from MSTR sales; the rest scraped together from STRF, STRK, and STRD preferred stock. A patchwork quilt of capital, stitched with the thread of desperation-or genius. Who can say? 🤷♂️
Strategy deepens bet on ‘digital gold’
The 641,205 BTC amassed for $47.49 billion-an average of $74,057 per coin-spans five years of relentless accumulation since August 2020. A love letter written in blockchain, addressed to Satoshi Nakamoto himself. 💕
Strategy’s dominance? Unchallenged. Its nearest rival, Marathon, clutches a paltry 53,250 BTC. A David to Goliath, a mouse to elephant. Twelvefold superiority! Yet does this crown weigh heavier than the scorn of the market? 🤔
Coinbase’s Armstrong, a fellow traveler in folly, bolstered reserves by 2,772 BTC post-Q3 profits. Ninth place on the corporate ledger-a bronze medal in the Olympics of speculation. 🏅
Strategy’s Q3 earnings? A $2.8 billion net income ($8.42/share)-a siren song of mark-to-market gains as BTC rose. But the stock, that fickle paramour, fell 14% in Q3, its premium over NAV evaporating like dew in the sun. The market, it seems, prefers tragedy over farce. 🎭
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2025-11-03 20:25