Meta’s Flutter: A Wall Street Tale

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Now, some folks on Wall Street got a bit excited yesterday – a real flurry, you might say – over shares of Meta Platforms, that company which owns Facebook, Instagram, and a few other contraptions. Shares jumped a good five or six percent, which, in these times, is akin to a gold rush in a thimble. It’s a curious thing, this stock market. Makes a man wonder if folks are buyin’ companies or just hopin’ to trade ’em to someone else for a bit more coin.

This Meta, you see, is one of those “Magnificent Seven” stocks they chatter about. Though “magnificent” feels a bit strong. A year ago, it wasn’t exactly climbin’ the peaks. Flat as a pancake, it was, while others were doin’ a jig. Seems the market forgot it for a spell. But Wall Street has a short memory, like a goldfish with a trust fund.

One fellow over at Jefferies, a name that sounds suspiciously like a haberdasher, has been singin’ Meta’s praises. Brent Thill, he’s called. He’s predictin’ a 45% rise in the stock price. A bold claim, that. Reminds me of the fella who predicted the perpetual motion machine. Still, it’s good to hear somebody’s optimistic, even if it’s just to keep the brokers busy.

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Jefferies Sees a 45% Upswing

Mr. Thill’s reckonin’ is that Meta’s been undervalued, seein’ as how Alphabet – that other big tech concern – has been doin’ so well. Alphabet’s stock has been climbin’ like a monkey up a silk curtain, while Meta’s been sittin’ still. It’s a simple enough notion: folks like a winner. Though I’ve known plenty of folks who bet on the losing horse just for the story.

Now, Meta’s lookin’ like the cheapest of the “Magnificent Seven” – a bargain, they say, at 28.5 times its earnin’s. That’s like sayin’ a slightly used buggy is a bargain at ten times the price of a new one. Still, they’re spendin’ a heap of money on Artificial Intelligence and that “Reality Labs” division. A gentleman can’t help but wonder what exactly is bein’ “created” in those labs, besides a bigger hole in the company’s pocketbook.

They’ve started puttin’ ads on Threads, that new platform they launched to compete with X (formerly Twitter, bless its chaotic soul). Four hundred million users, they boast. That’s a lot of eyeballs, I reckon. Though a million eyeballs ain’t worth a plugged nickel if nobody’s lookin’ at what you’re sellin’.

The AI Gamble

Mr. Thill’s hopin’ all this spendin’ on AI will pay off come 2026. That’s a mighty long time to wait for a return on investment. Reminds me of a farmer plantin’ seeds in rock. They spent a fortune buildin’ this “Metaverse,” a virtual world where folks can…well, I’m still tryin’ to figure that out. Reality Labs, that division, lost $4.4 billion last quarter. Four point four billion! That’s enough to buy a small country, or at least a very large collection of rocking chairs.

Investors are rightly suspicious of all this AI spendin’. But Mr. Thill points out that it’s helpin’ their core advertisin’ business, which grew a respectable 26% last quarter. That’s a good sign, I suppose. Though a growin’ business ain’t necessarily a sound business. It’s like a balloon – it can grow and grow until it pops.

We’ll hear more about their AI progress next Wednesday, when they report earnin’s. I suspect there will be a lot of fancy talk and carefully crafted numbers. Wall Street loves a good story, and they’re mighty good at tellin’ ’em. Whether that story is true or not…well, that’s another matter entirely.

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2026-01-23 00:03