
Imagine this: you’re staring at a spreadsheet, 3 a.m., coffee gone cold, and suddenly it hits you-ExxonMobil’s future isn’t about oil anymore. Or is it? The company’s latest report is a Rorschach test, and you’re the guy who’s convinced the inkblot is a giant middle finger. You’re not even mad, you’re just… confused. Like when your neighbor’s dog barks at a squirrel, but the squirrel’s clearly the victim here.
Here’s the thing: ExxonMobil’s got a reputation. It’s like that friend who always shows up late, but you’re still the one who drives them to the party. They’re stuck between legacy and legacy, trying to pivot without admitting they’re out of step. You can almost hear the boardroom debates: “Should we embrace renewables? No, wait-what’s a ‘renewable’ again?” It’s not chaos, it’s just… inefficient. Like a toaster that only toasts bread on one side.
You’re not saying they’re wrong to hedge their bets. You’re just annoyed they can’t decide if they’re a fossil fuel company or a tech startup. It’s the corporate equivalent of wearing a suit to a beach party. You’re not judging, you’re just… observing. And also, maybe, mildly offended. Because when a company’s strategy is as clear as a foggy window, you start wondering if they’re even trying.
By 2030, who knows? Maybe they’ll be the first to sell solar panels out of gas stations. Or maybe they’ll still be arguing about whether “green” means “less bad” or “not bad at all.” Either way, you’ll be there, sipping your coffee, wondering why no one else sees the obvious.
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2025-08-29 11:24