Ah, the theater of the absurd! Behold, the great Changpeng Zhao, Binance’s maestro of markets, has once again waved his wand-or rather, his wallet-and lo, the crypto world trembles! 🪄✨ Pardoned by the mighty Trump, CZ now plays the role of the benevolent patron, showering his riches upon the humble ASTER, a token so obscure it might as well have been plucked from the shadows of a Moscow back alley.
“Full disclosure. I just bought some Aster today, using my own money, on @Binance.”
“I am not a trader. I buy and hold.”
– CZ BNB (@cz_binance) November 2, 2025
Oh, the humility! A man of such wealth, declaring himself a mere holder, not a trader! 🧘♂️💎 Yet, his “hold” is more powerful than a thousand trades, for the moment his fingers danced across the keyboard, ASTER leapt from its slumber like a cat startled by a cucumber. 📈😼 From the depths of obscurity to a two-week high of $1.30-a 35% explosion, no less! The market, ever the dramatic diva, could not resist his charm.

But alas, the euphoria was fleeting, for the crypto gods are fickle. Within minutes, ASTER stumbled, its price settling above $1.20-still a 31% pump, mind you. 🌪️💸 Yet, one cannot help but wonder: is CZ a savior or a puppeteer? For this is not his first dance with destiny. Months ago, he whispered sweet nothings to the ASTER team on X, and the whales, ever the obedient choir, rushed to follow his lead. 🐳🎭
In this grand circus of coins and clowns, CZ remains the ringmaster, his every move a spectacle. Will ASTER rise again, or will it fade into the annals of crypto history? Only time-and CZ’s whims-will tell. 🎪🤡
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2025-11-02 21:25