Ah, Changpeng “CZ” Zhao—a man whose eyes glitter with dreams larger than the crypto-market’s mood swings—stood before Token2049’s Dubai throng and declared, “In a few years, I wish to lobotomize—pardon me, educate!—one hundred million, nay, one billion children. Gratis, my dears.” Imagine, if you will, a world where a classroom is as obsolete as the floppy disk, and no one pays tuition except in attention.
Giggle Academy (a name, I assure you, that tickles the ribs of every kindergarten existentialist), is his vehicle: an online temple where arithmetic waltzes with gamification and young minds are both the guests and the cake.
“With all this modern wizardry,” murmured the crypto-maestro, “building an app is child’s play—making it sticky, educational, and so deliciously addictive, that’s the real magic.” Imagine children everywhere, glued to their screens with the tenacity of a cat on a warm laptop.
Per the sacred scrolls—Giggle’s concept paper—the goal is to sprinkle free K-12 knowledge across the spinning globe, ushering children into the non-traditional multiverse: negotiations, entrepreneurship, blockchain, legal—little tykes negotiating bedtime contracts by age seven! Giggle unspools its lessons in phases, like a Bond villain (if Bond villains gave away bitcoin and algebra for free).
Lest one think CZ’s life too conventional, he bid adieu to Binance and stepped into a more penitential phase in April 2024. Four months meditating on life, law, and laundry in a US facility—not a bad setting to ponder lightbulb moments, provided one has a sturdy pillow and an iron constitution. He emerged, phoenix-like, in September 2024, resolute to educate—assuming parole and curriculum outweigh crypto temptations.
The Growing Menace (or Muse?) of Generative AI in Education
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Across the palmy swelter of Kerala, February 2024: KTCT Higher Secondary School introduced an AI humanoid teacher to the classroom. Early pilot, they said. One wonders if it ever sighs, “I’m sorry, Dave, I can’t let you pass this math test.”
Meanwhile, Andrej Karpathy—who once chauffeured code for Tesla and OpenAI—kickstarted Eureka Labs in July 2024. The quest: make AI-powered teaching assistants as ubiquitous as homework complaints, and waft knowledge through language barriers with the grace of a polyglot magician.
“If our robot symphony succeeds,” Andrej mused, “students—wherever, whenever—will be able to inhale the entirety of human knowledge. Learning anything will be as easy as ordering takeout. (Pray the robots don’t mix up math with masala.)”
🍰 It would seem, dear reader, education—powered by genies in both prison stripes and silicon—is ready for its stranger, funnier second act.
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2025-05-01 00:20