Crypto’s Wild Ride: Fed Minutes, Congress, and a Dash of Despair

by

If you thought your Monday morning coffee tasted bitter, wait until you see how the crypto market reacted to the latest macroeconomic shenanigans. Congress and the Fed have been busy turning the financial world into a game of Jenga, and someone forgot to stack the blocks properly.

Bitcoin’s Midlife Crisis: A 7% Drop to Remember

Bitcoin, ever the drama queen, extended its losses by 7% after the Federal Open Market Committee (FOMC) released their February Minutes. Because nothing says “confidence” like a 7% loss, right? The Minutes confirmed what we all knew deep down: the Fed isn’t cutting rates in March. Surprise! They’ve got bigger fish to fry, like figuring out how to monetize your student loan debt.

With less than 6% chance of a rate cut, the market decided to throw a pity party. Bitcoin hit $65,800 mid-week, a new low if you consider $65,000 a “low.” Ethereum, the eternal pessimist, dropped 10%, barely clinging to $2,000 like it’s the last life raft on a sinking cruise ship. Solana? It’s down 11% this week, but hey, at least it’s still above $80. And Ripple? That poor soul fell below $1.50. If that’s not a cry for help, I don’t know what is.

Now we wait for the Personal Consumption Expenditure (PCE) report on Friday. If inflation numbers are hotter than your ex’s Instagram stories, prepare for another round of crypto despair. But if the data cools down, maybe we’ll get a weekend of peace. Or not. Hope is a dangerous game.

The Fed’s New Obsession: Prediction Markets

Still reeling from the FOMC drama, the Fed has now thrown its support behind prediction markets. After a study on Kalshi, they’re claiming these markets are better at tracking inflation, unemployment, and GDP than traditional surveys. Because who needs a survey when you can just ask a bunch of strangers on the internet? It’s like democracy, but with more caffeine and fewer rules.

“Our study highlights the promise of prediction markets as a new benchmark for measuring expectations and informing monetary policy decisions.”

While this sounds like a win for innovation, the CFTC and state regulators are still bickering over who gets to regulate what. It’s like watching a toddler fight over a toy, except the stakes are higher and the toys are laws.

Coinbase’s Optimism: A Win-Win-Win for Everyone?

Coinbase CEO Brian Armstrong is convinced the CLARITY Act will result in a “win-win-win” for consumers, crypto, and banks. Because, of course, everyone involved in this mess deserves a happy ending. He’s bullish on stablecoin negotiations, even as Polymarket odds swing wildly from 85% to 55%. Senator Bernie Moreno (R-OH) insists the bill won’t favor banks, but let’s be honest-Congress is like a buffet. No one leaves hungry.

“Market structure is making great progress, and I believe we’re going to reach a win-win-win outcome.”

While the White House continues its third round of talks, the odds of passing the CLARITY Act remain as shaky as a house built on sand. But hey, at least they’re trying. Progress, even if it’s slow and legally ambiguous, is still progress.

Final Summary

  • Fed’s hawkish stance sent Bitcoin into a tailspin, proving that 7% losses are just Monday’s version of “meh.”
  • Coinbase’s dream of a “win-win-win” CLARITY Act remains as likely as Congress agreeing on a budget. Still, someone’s gotta try.

Read More

2026-02-19 16:48