Crypto Ticker War: It’s Messy 💸

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So, there’s this thing called Hyperliquid, right? And they needed a ticker symbol for their new US dollar stablecoin – USDH. Sounds straightforward. Like naming a pet hamster. Except instead of a hamster, it’s digital money, and instead of a cute name, it’s a full-blown, weeks-long saga involving accusations of…well, let’s just say “favoritism.” It’s the crypto world, after all. 🙄 It’s like watching a very serious, slightly sweaty bidding war for the right to represent the dollar. The *dollar*. You’d think they’d just…have one.

Native Markets “won” – and I’m putting that in quotes because the whole process apparently reeked of backroom deals and disappointed hopefuls – and their founder, Max Fiege, is promising something called a “Hyperliquid Improvement Proposal” (HIP). It sounds impressively bureaucratic for a system designed to avoid banks. They’re also throwing in an ERC-20 token on Ethereum, just for kicks. Because why not add another layer of complexity?

Native Markets has been awarded the USDH ticker on Hyperliquid.

Thank you to all HYPE stakers and network validators for their time and effort in reviewing the proposals put forward.

– max.hl (@fiege_max) September 14, 2025

Apparently, we’re all going to get to “test” this out by minting and redeeming up to $800 per transaction. Eight hundred dollars! As if $800 is slipping through the cracks of my sofa cushions. Once the testing is “over”, then unlimited mints and redeems. You know, just normal stuff.

A Bidding War So Ugly, It Needed a Safe Word

The prediction market, Polymarket, basically gave Native Markets the win before the vote even finished. Which is…comforting? Then Ethena bowed out, and suddenly everyone was yelling about a “farce” and “backroom deals.” Even folks at Dragonfly were calling it out. Haseeb Qureshi said the whole thing was a joke. I’m sensing a theme here. 🎭

Are Stablecoins Just…Walmarts Now?

Helius CEO Mert Mumtaz mused that stablecoins are becoming commodities. Which, honestly, makes sense. Soon, we’ll just see “USD” on the screen and the exchanges will sort out the messy stablecoin swapping behind the scenes. Like buying bread. You don’t need to know which farm grew the wheat, you just want a loaf. 🍞

And HYPE, the thing these people are staking and validating with? It’s up nearly 11% this week. $54.19 a pop. And a market cap of 18.10 billion. It’s enough to make you start believing in magic beans. Or at least, a slightly more organized system for exchanging pictures of apes.

So, USDH is launching, and everyone is questioning everything. Transparency! The future of stablecoins! It’s all very important, I’m sure. I’ll be over here, trying to remember where I put my actual money. 🤷

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2025-09-15 07:01