Crypto Caper! Mango Markets Meltdown and a $110 Million Comedy of Errors

Alright folks, gather ’round! The feds are knocking on Avraham “Avi” Eisenberg’s door, asking Judge Arun Subramanian to give this crypto caper kingpin a nice little vacation—behind bars for over six and a half years. 🕵️‍♂️🔒

Why? Because Avi managed to pull off a $110 million heist on the decentralized exchange Mango Markets back in 2022. No, it’s not a sequel to “Ocean’s Eleven,” just real-life crypto chaos — except less cool and more court dates.

Prosecutors want prison time between 78 and 97 months—which is the legal way of saying “sorry, Avi, no yacht parties for a while.” This comes after Avi’s April 2024 conviction for wire fraud, commodities fraud, and a cocktail of other bad choices (plus some truly awful charges, but we’ll keep it light here…ish). 🍸🚫

“We gotta make sure the law doesn’t take a coffee break,” the prosecutors told the judge. In other words: steal a hundred million, and you’re not just losing your crypto keys—you’re losing your freedom keys too.

Meanwhile, Mango Markets, the little digital playground where this all went down, announced it’s shutting down shop faster than a Vegas buffet at midnight. Launched in August 2021, kaput by February 3, 2025. RIP Mango Markets, you had a wild two-and-a-half years. 🍋💻

Mango Markets Exploit Cartoon

During the trial, Avi’s lawyers played the “it’s legit, your honor” card, claiming he was just employing some “legal trading strategy” to score his $110 million payday. Sure, and I’m the Queen of England. 👑💸

He handed back about $67 million of the loot—think of it as “found money”—but has been clutching the other $40 million tighter than a squirrel with its last acorn. Community vote said, “Okay, keep some,” because who doesn’t love a plot twist? 🤷‍♂️💰

Mango Markets Wants Their Dough (and Maybe a Big Apology)

The exchange’s lawyers sent a “please pay up” note asking for $47 million restitution — basically saying, “Avi, buddy, let’s fix this mess before we call in the clowns.” Because money doesn’t erase scandal, but it sure does help pay the bills.

“Return the money, Avi! No amount of cash will heal the wounds, but hey, it’s a start,” Mango Markets pleaded. It’s like saying sorry with a giant check instead of just a “my bad” text.

Avi was arrested in December 2022, and his sentencing has been playing a game of “now you see it, now you don’t” — originally set for December 2024, now hopping along to February, then April 2025. Lawyers say it’s complicated, but we all know that means paperwork and coffee breaks. ☕⚖️

2025-04-24 09:12

Mango Markets Wants Their Dough (and Maybe a Big Apology)

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