China vs. Crypto: Game Over? 🤯

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So, the Dragon stirs again. November 28th, 2025 – a date to remember, or perhaps forget if you’re one of those chasing digital phantoms. The People’s Bank of China, those stern faces behind mahogany desks, have once more decreed: these “virtual assets,” this…crypto… it’s all dust and echoes. No legal standing. Not money. Just whispers in the digital wind. They’ve noticed, you see, that the rabble are at it again, playing with this intangible stuff. Trading, scamming, and trying to sneak fortunes out of the country. Honestly, the audacity! It’s like trying to smuggle water into the ocean. 😂

The Bureaucracy Flexes: A Meeting of the Minds (and Power)

A grand assembly, they had – ten of the most important government bodies all huddled together, like wolves deciding which lamb to chase. A truly impressive display of coordinated frowning.

Turns out, the prices are rising, the hype is spreading… mostly through those infernal social platforms where young people gather to dream of instant riches. A dangerous thing, hope is. Especially when fueled by lines of code. 🙄

They’ve spotted all the usual signs: new schemes promising impossible returns, money vanishing across borders, and stablecoins – those supposed safe havens – becoming magnets for the unscrupulous. Apparently, folks are trying to bypass the perfectly reasonable capital controls. Can you imagine the cheek?

On Nov. 28, China’s central bank (PBOC) convened a coordination meeting and reiterated that: Virtual assets do not have the same legal status as fiat, are not legal tender, and must not be used as currency in market circulation; related business activities constitute illegal…

– Wu Blockchain (@WuBlockchain) November 29, 2025

The Decree: Still Illegal, Still Troublesome

They claim their previous efforts, way back in 2021, were “effective.” Of course they were. Everything the government does is always effective. 😇 But now, with those global prices mocking all common sense, the beast is stirring again.

  • These “virtual assets” aren’t real money. Understand?
  • Dealing in them? That’s not finance, that’s illegal finance.

Stablecoins: The Particularly Naughty Ones

Ah, stablecoins. A focus, they say. A problem, they insist. Just another form of digital fluff according to these wise men. No proper identification. No way to track the dirty money flowing through them. It’s a free-for-all for those who prefer shadows and deception. The thought!

Apparently, these things are perfect for secret payments, swindles, and making money disappear. The message is blunt: crypto remains firmly outlawed on the mainland. And you’ll like it. 😉

The Plan: More of the Same, But Louder

China has ordered its departments to block access to these shadowy exchanges and keep a closer watch on every byte of data, every yen that moves. A thorough scrubbing, you might say.

They’ll share information, they promise, so they can crush the illegal activities faster and protect the people from being fleeced. “Financial stability” is the mantra, you see. As if it can be found in bits and bytes.

This isn’t a temporary issue, oh no. It’s a “long-term challenge.” Which means, of course, continued crackdowns. Because that’s what governments do best. They crack down. It’s practically a national sport. 🫡

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2025-11-29 12:41