But wait! Like a phoenix rising from its ashes—or perhaps more aptly, like a gambler who finds an extra chip in his pocket—the stock recovered some ground after Q1 earnings. Yet, dear reader, valuations have once again swelled like bread in an oven, leaving us to ponder: should one leap into this speculative abyss before the Q2 report? Or would prudence dictate we sit on the sidelines, sipping tea while others do the heavy lifting?
Last year, Nvidia did the impossible: doubled its sales. If you doubled your money every time you walked into a casino, the casino would burn down. But gravity gets everything in the end, except maybe the S&P 500. Eventually, customers buy enough chips to stack to the moon, and “competitors” show up with something that looks suspiciously like the same silicon—but cheaper. Still, a trader knows: you don’t need to keep breaking your own absurd records to make money. You just need to surpass the dreams of the crowd staring at the ticker tape.
The stablecoin industry’s growth from $20 billion to $250 billion in five years is a tale of digital gold-rush fever. Six percent of the $4 trillion crypto market may sound modest, but it’s a colossus in the making. Tether (USDT) and USDC (USDC) now rank fourth and seventh among cryptocurrencies, their market caps bloated with the savings of millions. Yet, for every dollar locked in these coins, there’s a warehouse worker in Manila or a Uber driver in São Paulo who sees only the promise of stability—and the shadow of risk.
While the breathless pronouncements about self-driving cares generally revolve around Tesla and the somewhat earnest efforts of Waymo, Uber is operating with a finesse quite its own. They’re not attempting to *build* the confounded vehicles, you see. Rather, they aim to become the rather indispensable software and – more importantly – the demand layer. Which is, frankly, much more sensible.
They’re at $3.7 billion valuation as of August 1st. Three point seven *billion*. For a company still waiting for data. It’s like…buying a timeshare based on a rendering. A *rendering*! But the industry, naturally, is doing its thing, pretending this makes sense. After Pfizer’s fiasco and Roche’s…well, whatever *that* was—spending billions and then getting nothing? It’s supposed to create an “opportunity”? Just admit it was a bad bet!
If I had a penny for every time a geopolitical development caused my portfolio to wobble, I’d be writing this from a sunlit beach, not hunched over a laptop contemplating the latest market chaos. Last week’s plunge seemed tied to some sort of international game of poker—only everyone’s bluffing, and no one really knows the hands being played. The US made a surprising move: lifting technology export restrictions on high-performance semiconductors and chipmaking tech, ostensibly to give Huawei a boost or perhaps to spice up negotiations with China. But for TMC, this was more like watching a ship veer perilously close to rocky shores — not good, especially since seabed minerals are, I’ve come to understand, kind of the company’s raison d’être.
What sparked the bloodshed? Not some spectacular quarterly earnings or a coup de grâce from a rival firm. No, it was the subtle, insidious announcement that the U.S. government’s calculus on China had shifted—lifting restrictions on keystones of AI warfare that once made these stocks sweat bullets in secret underground bunkers. Suddenly, the valuation that had surged 90.5% over a savage three-month sprint started wobbling—a cautious retreat as traders, with sweat-stained palms, sensed the winds turning. Because in the bloody arena of AI-infused defense stocks, perception is death and reality is just a distant second.
The initial bloodletting stemmed, predictably, from the Great American Trade Tango with China. One minute, semiconductor restrictions are holding—a pathetic attempt to contain the dragon. The next? GONE. Vanished into the ether, courtesy of the ever-unpredictable hand of Washington. Suddenly, the possibility of a “deal” loomed, a horrifying prospect for anyone trying to build a sustainable business. Because a deal with China is never a deal, it’s a temporary ceasefire in a long, slow WAR for technological dominance.
Buffett and Munger, those twin architects of fortune, have conjured a 5,500,000% ascent, a feat that would make even the most jaded alchemist envious. The S&P 500, that paragon of mediocrity, lags in its 39,000% march—a mere footnote to the symphony of Berkshire’s crescendo.
Behold Generac Holdings (GNRC), a maker of backup power generators, whose stock soared 36% in July, ascending as if lifted by some divine hand—or perhaps merely the clever machinations of mortal greed. The catalyst? A better-than-expected earnings report, delivered with all the subtlety of a thunderclap at the month’s end.