Retail Traders Dump $258m in Nvidia: Will Bitcoin Be Their Next Big Bet?

According to Vanda Research, retail investors jettisoned a cool $258 million worth of Nvidia stock during the week ending June 4. Meanwhile, institutions remain unfazed, continuing their quiet accumulation of the tech giant’s shares. Seems like retail’s trying to play it smart, but will their next move be in the direction of crypto?

Trump’s Bold bid: Bitcoin ETF or Circus Act? 🤡💰

This pièce de résistance, if ever blessed with SEC approval, promises to transform ordinary mortals into Bitcoin aficionados with a flick of the wrist—or monstrous marketing budget. It’s a novel twist in the already merry-go-round of Bitcoin investment tools, where everyone from hedge fund oligarchs to grandma’s sock drawer claims to have the “next big thing.”

Dark Web Busted: US Cracks Down on Cryptic Crimes with a Thud and a Chuckle

By some miracle of bureaucracy, or perhaps just good old-fashioned police work, BidenCash now leads to a server controlled by the police—because nothing says “clean internet” like a government trap. Launched in March 2022, it grew faster than a virus in a crowded subway, luring over 117,000 users into the dark folds of the web and raking in a cool $17 million selling stolen credit card details. Talk about a digital gold rush — except the gold was someone else’s credit limit.

Is JPMorgan Finally Embracing Crypto? You Won’t Believe What’s Next!

According to a Bloomberg report on June 4th (because if it’s not Bloomberg, did it even happen?), JPMorgan is ready to roll out this bold new offering for their high-net-worth clients. You know, the ones with more money than they know what to do with. Starting with BlackRock’s iShares Bitcoin Trust – yes, the one with over $70 billion in net assets, because why not start big?

Brace Yourself: The EU’s Quest for Tech Sovereignty Could Change Everything!

On June 3, the Committee on Industry, Research and Energy (ITRE), that hotbed of intellectual activity, adopted a non-binding report on digital infrastructure. The crux of the report? Europe must “catch up” to the US and China. You know, no big deal. Apparently, this is all about lifting the barriers on private investment, promoting energy-efficient computing (how very 21st century), and safeguarding privacy in digital finance. You can almost hear the applause from Silicon Valley, can’t you?

Crypto Leverage: The Quiet Rise of Debt and Drama in Q1

Crypto Chart

Total crypto-collateralized lending dipped 4.9% quarter-over-quarter to $39.07 billion—apparently, the crypto thirst for borrowing is not eternal, at least not without a break. Galaxy Research’s Q1 2025 report shows it’s a gentle contraction, not a collapse. But let’s face it, even the strongest soap bubbles eventually pop. 🫧

Bitcoin Debt Drama: Storm in a Digital Teacup

Bitcoin Treasuries Debt

“I know some are worried about the bitcoin treasury companies and their debt becoming a problem, but for now, we think those fears are overblown.” — Alex Thorn, presumably holding a crystal ball that’s actually just a very shiny pebble.