Bitcoin and Ethereum, the undisputed kings of the crypto world, are not just experiencing a surge in their prices. As the market regains its bullish momentum, the Exchange-Traded Funds (ETFs) for these two digital assets have been enjoying a positive outlook for quite some time now.
This move has, of course, enraged the pro-Bitcoin crowd, led by Senator Cynthia Lummis, who’s been championing the cause of a strategic Bitcoin reserve. Because, you know, we can’t let China get ahead of us in the Bitcoin race 🏃♀️. I mean, who needs healthcare or education when we can have a bunch of digital coins?
Leading the charge against the bill was none other than US Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene, the self-proclaimed Chairwoman of the DOGE Committee. In a statement that could have been lifted straight from a stand-up comedy routine, Greene explained that her opposition was rooted in the bill’s glaring omission: a ban on Central Bank Digital Currencies (CBDCs). “Americans don’t want a government-controlled digital dollar,” she declared, as if the government hadn’t already meddled in every other aspect of our lives. “Republicans have a duty to defend financial freedom and privacy by opposing CBDCs,” she added, with a straight face that would make a poker player blush. 🃏
On this fine Wednesday, our dear little Pepe coin has decided to engage in a most audacious dance, elbowing its way to the top as investors casually flood into the Ethereum (ETH) ecosystem. Meanwhile, the grand old Bitcoin BTC is having a quiet moment at a rather stately $119,366 with a modest 24h volatility: of 2.1%. Not one to make a scene, really.
Market cap: a staggering $2.38 trillion—Oh, the weight of money!
Vol. 24h: $49.42 billion.
But wait, there’s more! The WLFI token was designed to give holders the right to participate in the protocol’s governance and decision-making. Because, you know, voting is the cornerstone of democracy… or is it? 🤣
💊🚔 This is an initiative within a much bigger initiative by U.S. law enforcement on a national level. The DEA and its partners have seized huge quantities of illicit drugs since January 2025. They have confiscated around 44 million fentanyl pills and 4,500 pounds of fentanyl powder. They have also removed almost 65,000 pounds of methamphetamine and more than 201,500 pounds of cocaine from the streets. These figures indicate the extent to which the drug problem is still prevalent in the United States.
In the latest thrilling episode of “What Are The Whales Up To?”, Whale Alert has been doing some deep sea diving and spotted some MASSIVE Ethereum transfers. Over 117,678 ETH was moved in less than four hours. That’s about $374 MILLION. Yes, you read that right. If you’re sitting down, now’s a good time. 😱
As he lounged comfortably in the NPR-sounding armchair of CNBC’s Squawk Box, he casually declared that the time has come for GameStop to pivot away from the burdensome realities of hardware sales. As costs swell like a kettle on a slow boil, the company’s newfound beacon of hope shines upon trading cards and the curious realm of collectibles, with the specter of cryptocurrency payments dancing on the horizon.
In a proclamation that would make even the most subdued socialite raise an eyebrow, Ctrl Alt has vowed to dance with Ripple’s institutional-grade custody technology, thus providing a veritable treasure chest for the digital assets bestowed upon Dubai’s audacious real estate endeavor. Reece Merrick, the Managing Director, showered praise upon this initiative, suggesting it is “a perfect example of the type of forward-thinking, innovative initiative that is positioning Dubai at the heart of the global digital asset industry.” One can only hope that the heart of Dubai has a good health plan! 💖
