🤑 Hackers Gone Wild: $2.9B Vanishes in 2025 Crypto Chaos! 🚀

According to SlowMist, the blockchain world is now a high-stakes game of cat and mouse. While the number of hacks dropped from 410 to 200, the damage skyrocketed. Why? Hackers are trading in their spray-and-pray tactics for fancy, multi-step operations. It’s like they’ve all enrolled in Hacker University. 🎓

Dogecoin to $10? The 7-Period Fractal Says “Hold My Beer” 🍻💸

Dogecoin chart looking fancy

But wait! Before you write off Doge as the financial equivalent of a fidget spinner, some tech-savvy wizard has emerged with a fractal analysis that says it’s headed to $10. 🧙‍♂️✨ Apparently, Dogecoin is dancing to the rhythm of the number seven-because why not? Sevens are trendy now, like avocado toast but for charts. 🥑📈 This “seven-month fractal” has been spotted in gold, the S&P 500, and even Bitcoin’s 2021 double top (remember that? Good times). ⏳

XRP’s 41% Crash Risk? Holders Are Buying… Or Are They? 🚨

What makes this setup unusual is that multiple buyer groups are finally stepping in. Long-term holders are buying again, short-term holders are adding, yet one group isn’t convinced. That clash explains why the chart still leans bearish. It’s like a group therapy session where everyone’s on board except the one person who’s just there for the snacks. 🍿

Crypto Market Takes a Tumble: Is the Sky Falling or Just a Bad Hair Day?

As Bitcoin spiraled into the depths of despair, Ethereum, that second-largest wannabe, dropped about 2.3%, now flirting with the $2,973 price tag. XRP and Solana, meanwhile, took a similar plunge, declining by 2% to 3%. It seems the entire market has adopted a rather melancholic “risk-off” attitude, not unlike a cat that just realized it’s been taken to the vet.