In a twist as unexpected as finding a cactus in a kitchen, the fund now finds itself packed up, closing shop shortly after McCann unveiled his grandiose plan for a $1 billion Solana treasury initiative. Timing? What timing! Critics are sharpening their pencils, eagerly circling like vultures waiting for a feast. 🦅
Behold, the tokens flee exchanges like startled sparrows, 693,000 of them in a week—evidence of accumulation so fervent, one might mistake it for a cult. StableCoinX, with its $5 million daily buyback ritual (a siren song for wallets), ensures demand’s pulse quickens. Futures markets, ever the speculative gluttons, swell with open interest, while TVL and protocol usage grow, whispering, “Adoption is afoot.” Or is it just a mirage? 😏
Behold! On July 23, U.S.-listed spot Bitcoin ETFs bled $86 million in net outflows, according to SoSoValue data. This marks the third consecutive day of losses—a sharp reversal from their glorious 12-day inflow streak earlier this week. Oh, how fortunes change! 💔
Pippen, who may or may not have had tea with Satoshi Nakamoto in a dream (what a soirée that must have been!), has offered his followers a veritable smorgasbord of speculative delights. In true showman fashion, he framed his forecasts as a poll, inviting his 729,000 loyal fans to weigh in on what they think will happen by 2026. One can almost hear him saying, “Darlings, place your bets!” 🎲
This week, the intrepid data explorers at Glassnode have ruminated on some valuation models for Ethereum. You know, just the light stuff—Realized Price, True Market Mean, and Active Realized Price. Sounds like your typical dinner discussion, right?
He speaks of “faster and cheaper” transactions. Faster, perhaps, than a snail mail letter from Siberia, but cheaper… one suspects the cost is merely shifted, not truly diminished. A new layer of abstraction, a new set of hands reaching for their share. 💸 It benefits us all, he assures us, with the same sincerity one might expect from a man selling indulgences. And his pronouncements to Bloomberg… how predictable! A stage perfectly crafted for such announcements.
With this new union, those brave souls perusing BeInCrypto’s price pages—behold, the fabled Bitcoin and Ethereum—shall now bask in the radiant glow of CoinGecko’s formidable data machine. Expect accurate, up-to-the-minute pricing, formidable volume stats, liquidity measurements that glimmer in the dark, and history lessons on over 17,000 cryptocurrencies. Yes, dear reader, more than the number of politicians who’ve ever made a promise to you—tracked amidst 1,000+ exchanges, centralized and decentralized alike. 💰⚖️
Our esteemed Congress has done it again! 🎉 They’ve tasked the VA Secretary with studying blockchain, that magical buzzword they heard at a tech conference, to “improve efficiency, security, and transparency” in benefits processing. Because nothing says “we care” like forcing veterans to navigate a decentralized ledger system that’s basically a spreadsheet on steroids. 📊 … Read more
Since the fifteenth of May, a veritable frenzy of purchasing hath ensued, with exchange-traded funds (ETFs) and corporations vying most ardently for the acquisition of nearly 2.83 million ETH, a sum exceeding $10 billion. Imagine, if you will, the scene at Almack’s, with suitors clamoring for the hand of the fairest maiden—only here, the prize is Ethereum, and the competition is thirty-two times more fervent than the supply can bear! 💸
And oh, what a spectacle! The little coin that could—until it couldn’t—plummeted faster than you can say “Sucker’s Rally.” Images of traders clutching their wallets and sobbing into their keyboards flash vividly. 🖥️😭