Cryptonews

This digital marvel debuted this week on the BaFin-regulated platform, proudly claiming the title of “first of its kind” under the EU’s bizarrely named Markets in Crypto-Assets Regulation (MiCA). Because nothing says “progress” quite like stuffing an entire universe of hopes into a regulation that reads like a Kafkaesque script-full of legal labyrinths and bureaucratic rabbit holes. The Euro and Dollar coins woven into this web, backed by logical wonders like the Bank of New York Mellon, are offered to an audience of investors who, no doubt, exchange glances of either hope or skepticism.

This partnership, it seems, is all about empowering creators with the power to control their intellectual property-though one wonders if they’ll also gain the power to control their own narratives, or if the blockchain will do that for them. 🧠🔒

Bitcoin, like a troubled soul in the depths of despair, attempts a pitiful recovery at $113,000 after plunging to a grim $112,000. Traders, full of grim foreboding, wager that another fall may be on the horizon.

On the fateful day of September 22, LINK suffered an 8% plunge, a tragicomic dip in a broader market decline that sent prices skittering toward the $21 mark. A billion dollars in market cap vanished, poof! like a magician’s rabbit, leaving the token’s valuation hovering at a mere $14.8 billion. Yet, in this moment of panic, the whales-those leviathans of lucre-seized the opportunity to buy the dip, gobbling up over 800,000 LINK tokens. Greed, thy name is whale. 🐳💸

Enter Steam. Not the trusty engine of entertainment we all know, but rather, the smooth-talking scammer’s best friend. Plavnieks was duped into playing a game called Block Blasters, a title that promised financial rewards in exchange for playing. Ah, but there’s a catch: it wasn’t a game-it was malware disguised as a game. So, like a moth to a flame, Plavnieks clicked, and the malware did what it does best-it drained his crypto wallet faster than a teenager can spend their first paycheck.

By Shayan (yep, that’s the guy who’s gonna try to make sense of this mess)

Now, the million-dollar question: Is ASTER the next big DeFi thing, or are we looking at a classic case of hype masking high-risk? You tell me.

Meanwhile, the “whales” of Dogecoin are now swimming toward Pepe Unchained (PEPU), a new meme coin that’s supposedly going to rocket 208% in 2025. Because nothing says “financial stability” like a dancing frog. 🐸🚀

This week, Bitcoin lost nearly 2%, dancing around the $113,000 mark. September’s options expiry is whispering sweet nothings about $110,000-probably the “max pain”-which, let’s face it, sounds like a sadist’s favorite game of pretend. Max pain? Just a poetic way to say traders are likely to get hurt.

According to our fanciful 4-hour magic chart, that splashy dip was likely due to some dastardly bearish divergence! Picture this: as Bitcoin was strutting up to $117,500, the Stochastic RSI and RSI were busy throwing sneaky lower highs-classic bear trickery, I say! However, despite this mischief, it seems our beloved Bitcoin might just be poised for a cheeky comeback! 🎩✨