Cryptonews

Key points:

And wouldn’t you know it, Sun’s hollering to get his tokens back, like a boy who’s lost his kite in a thunderstorm.

Fresh from their purchase of Molecular Labs (presumably a group of Nobel Prize-winning boffins and a coffee machine), Paxos Labs plans to mint USDH so natively on HyperEVM and HyperCore, one suspects the very atoms will hum with compliance. And compliance! Never have so many jurisdictions been so enthusiastically namedropped: MiCA, GENIUS claims, and possibly Interpol, if things go south. Expect onchain and fiat rails for on/off‑ramps so global, even your aunt in Buenos Aires might get involved – accidentally, after pressing the wrong emoji. 🤑

Imagine, if you will, a world where two cryptocurrencies, XRP and ADA, were locked in a fierce battle for supremacy. For most of last year, they were like two sleepy cats, barely moving. ADA was napping in a cozy range between $0.3 and $0.5, while XRP was dozing off between $0.4 and $0.6, occasionally twitching in its sleep.

Arkham Intelligence, because of course someone as coolly dramatic as Arkham noticed these guys, flagged these Bitcoins tied to Movie2K-a name that’s about as highbrow as a middle-schooler’s playlist. Remember Movie2K? That piracy website everyone loved to love to hate? Well, the operators were nabbed back in 2019, but you’d think German authorities did the World Cup juggling act so smoothly that they left this treasure unopened. Oh, and those 49,858 BTC they did snag earlier? Sold them off last summer when Bitcoin wouldn’t look at them and was sulking at $57,900.

The Pi Coin (PI), as of this seventh day of September, was observed to be trading at a mere $0.3440. A state of affairs it has endured, with remarkable consistency, since the month of August. One wonders if excitement is entirely lacking, or if investors possess a peculiar taste for stagnation.

Enter Thumzup, strutting onto the scene with a $50 million capital raise to purchase 2,500 Dogecoin mining rigs (with dreams of expanding to 3,500). They’re also snapping up DogeHash Technologies, presumably to corner the market on Dogecoin mining chic. At current prices, this operation could rake in anywhere from $22 million to $103 million annually. “Large-scale mining is critical,” quips crypto analyst SeniorDeFi, who sees a potential 72% surge to $0.37. Darling, if only my bank account had such ambitions. 💰

In other news, SHIB’s price took a slight nosedive, dropping down like your grandma after she sits on the last piece of pie. 🍰 Are you kidding me? It couldn’t even hold on to that 1.9% rise from Friday! Talk about a rollercoaster of emotions! 🎢

Buckle up! BTC is dominating the chatter like a social media influencer. Users are debating its glam status as “digital gold,” long-term investment vibes, and the parade of government and institutional backing. Apparently, everyone’s now into self-custody-sounds so empowering, right? 🛡️

On a day not unlike any other, Friday whispered its secrets in trade disclosures: ARK’s grand trifecta-ARKK, ARKW, ARKF-happened upon a buffet, devouring 387,325 shares of BitMine, about $16 million’s worth, and 143,906 slices of Bullish pie, all tender at $7.5 million. ARKK, the ostentatious heavyweight, claimed the lion’s share, proudly puffing up its chest.