On a fateful Sunday, the sage of financial prudence took to the digital agora to warn of the tempest brewing on the horizon, yet he, like a wise farmer, prepares his storehouses with the treasures of the earth. 🌪️🌾
Hold on to your seats, folks! 🚀 Recent Glassnode data shows that XRP investors are cashing in on their gains like there\’s no tomorrow! 🤑
Franklin Templeton, Grayscale, and Canary Capital have all made amendments to speed up the approval process. Like a pack of wolves circling a vulnerable lamb, they’re all hoping the SEC doesn’t throw a wrench into their plans. 🐺
Oh, what a spectacle! The economist, whose love for gold rivals only his disdain for anything digital, has once more unsheathed his rhetorical sword against bitcoin. With the fervor of a street preacher warning of the apocalypse, Schiff insists that this “fool’s gold” is but a fleeting illusion, destined to crumble beneath the weight of its own absurd valuation. 🏴☠️💸 “Sell now!” he cries, as if $100,000 were not a price but a divine signal-a celestial billboard flashing “ABANDON SHIP!” in neon letters.
In a QuickTake post on CryptoQuant, the indefatigable Amr Taha reveals a farcical shift in Bitcoin’s retail activity on the Binance network. Taha’s report, a masterpiece of dry wit, focuses on the ‘[Bitcoin] LTH/STH Buy/Sell Binance’ metric, which distinguishes between the sober Long-Term Holders (LTHs) and the flighty Short-Term Holders (STHs). A tale as old as time itself. ⏳📊
Ah, but the plot thickens! The astute on-chain researcher known only as MLM has unearthed whispers of something tantalizingly cryptic labeled BLP, which we can only assume stands for BorrowLendingProtocol-a rather uninspired moniker reminiscent of the tedium oppressive bureaucracies love. One does wonder what ‘creative geniuses’ are the brains behind such riveting nomenclature.
Dormant wallets awaken – Old whales are finally stretching their fins, dumping 1,000 BTC per hour like it’s going out of style. 🐋💸
Yes, my dear, the altcoin remains above its key support, a feat as impressive as maintaining one’s wit after three martinis. 🍸 Yet, one must wonder: how long can this charade continue? The bears are prowling, and the market’s mood is as dour as a raincloud at Ascot.
So, Dogecoin’s price decided to be generous and increased by 10% in the last 24 hours. Why? Apparently, the Bitwise Spot Dogecoin ETF is about to be launched, and everyone’s on the edge of their seats. No one saw that coming… except maybe, you know, everyone who’s been watching crypto for 5 minutes. 🙄
According to Cryptoquant’s latest missive, their Bull Score Index has plummeted to zero-a number as devoid of life as a society hostess’s heart. This, they declare, signals an “extremely bearish” posture, a phrase so dreary it could only be uttered by a man in a velvet smoking jacket, sipping absinthe. 🦹♂️💔
