This reform, the most significant since Uniswap’s 2020 token launch, aims to transform UNI from a passive governance token into a deflationary, yield-generating beast. A most noble pursuit, if one can ignore the chaos it might unleash.
Visa Inc. (NYSE: V), in a move that has surely sent ripples through the drawing rooms of finance, unveiled on the 12th of November a pilot so bold, so revolutionary, it dares to allow businesses to send payouts directly to stablecoin wallets. Yes, you read correctly-stablecoin wallets. Whatever next? The announcement, made at the Web Summit in Lisbon (a place of much ado about nothing, if ever there was one), promises to streamline global transactions for creators and gig workers. How very convenient. 🌐
Oh, the sight to behold! Hardly moments ago, lawmakers from both houses danced through the masquerade of deliberation. The Democrats sung for more moolah for healthcare and other such scrumptious indulgences, whereas the Republicans, true to form, preferred to jive with the idea of simply reopening the doors first. 😂
The hapless ADA has been tossed about like a Victorian heroine in a tempest, plummeting 20% to hover near 0.57. Traders, armed with spreadsheets and existential dread, fixate on the sacred $0.50 support level, where hope-or hubris-might intervene.
That’s right, Transak USA LLC has secured a shiny set of MTLs in Iowa, Kansas, Michigan, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, and Vermont! 🌽🍁 Now, with a grand total of 11 states on its license list, this company is ready to make stablecoin payments as easy as swiping a credit card at a vending machine. Seriously, it’s that smooth. Transak made this big announcement on Nov. 11, 2025, and you better believe they’re celebrating in style. 😎
Yahoo Finance will soon be graced with Polymarket’s live, real-time predictions. Yes, you’ll be able to wager on everything from politics to economics-and possibly your next vacation destination (if you’re feeling lucky). 🏖️
The total crypto market cap dropped by 2% to hover around $3.42 trillion at press time, a figure so modest it could fit in a teacup. BTC price slipped below $102k again after the bullish momentum failed to gain traction, much like a man in a bowler hat trying to outrun a charging rhino. 🐃🎩
On a random Tuesday (because why not?), Schwartz took to X (formerly Twitter, but let’s not get into that) to school us all. Someone asked, “Why spend Bitcoin if it’s gonna moon later?” And he was like, “Girl, because people are living in the now, not just HODLing for the apocalypse.” 🌙 Basically, using Bitcoin today is like saying, “I trust this more than my ex’s promises.” 💸
But hey, fundamentals are holding up like a good push-up bra. Sentiment’s neutral, ETFs are chugging along, and institutions are here for the long haul. Long-term holders are buying like it’s Black Friday, while short-term traders are ghosting. 👻 Funding rates? As neutral as Switzerland. 🇨🇭
Apparently, these networks come with built-in superpowers: hardcoded tricks, config file nudges, and on-chain contract magic – because what’s life without a little control, right? Mostly, they surfaced after some hacker got greedy and stole millions (because stealing is so last century).
