Enter the Bonk [BONK] ecosystem, strutting out with a launchpad so snazzy it’s simultaneously shrinking supply and inflating hype faster than you can say “flying spaghetti code.”
On the 1-hour chart, our dear XRP is trapped in a straitjacket between $3.02 and $3.075, like a bureaucrat in a Gogol novel, unable to decide whether to ascend or descend. A mild pullback from $3.075 has left it stabilizing, its structure as “constructive” as a nose on a face. Higher lows remain, yet a bearish divergence lurks, as subtle as a sneeze in a silent room. Tactical parameters? Oh, they’re as clear as a foggy morning: entries at $3.02 to $3.04, exits at $3.08 to $3.10. Range-bound, indeed! 🧐📉
As part of this most ambitious alliance, Cypher Capital shall endeavor to craft strategies so cunning they might make a fox blush-strategies designed to entice institutions to dabble in POL, earn yield like it’s 1895 and they’re at a stock exchange, and help secure the network. Rumor has it they’ve already taken a sizable position in POL, which is either a shrewd move or a very British way of saying “I’ve invested in a hat.”
But hold your applause! This is but a mere administrative pirouette, a nod from the DTCC that these ETFs exist somewhere in the whimsical realm of “not-yet-approved” by the venerable U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission, that august body which delights in exercising the virtue of procrastination.
Well, I’ll be jiggered! Over the past two days, Bitcoin [BTC] has leapt like a startled gazelle, bounding from $111.5k to $115.4k-a jolly 3.53% surge. And what’s behind this financial fandango? Why, the 11th of September saw the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics unleash the August 2025 CPI numbers, old sport. 📰💸
Yet amidst this soaring ballet, the wise analysts-those somber soothsayers with their graphs and warnings-whisper caution. The rally, they say, may soon dissolve like morning mist, for the indicators unveil a saturation of profit. This, my friend, is the ominous herald of a downward pirouette.
So, Dogecoin’s weekly chart has decided to enter a zone that has historically made all the traders in the room squeal in excitement. Trader Tardigrade (who seems to know a thing or two about cryptocurrencies and maybe space travel) said:
Ah, Gemini! Backed by the illustrious Tyler and Cameron Winklevoss (yes, the *same* Winklevoss twins who once argued over Facebook like two toddlers over a toy), has decided to grace us mere mortals with its public offering. At a modest price of $28 per share, they’ve now pushed their company to a staggering $3.3 billion. I mean, sure, why not? Who needs modesty when you’re swimming in crypto cash? 💰
Ethereum wrapped up the day looking as bullish as a bodybuilder at a protein shake convention, boosted by strong ETHBTC dynamics. CRYPTOWZRD chimed in,
South Africa’s Altvest Capital, now rechristened as ABC, has swapped its staid image for a crypto crown, becoming the first publicly-listed firm to build a Bitcoin treasury. A bold move, indeed, though one wonders if they’ve mistaken the JSE for a casino. 🎰
