Bitcoin’s $100K Dream Derailed? 😬

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Bitcoin (BTC) is currently playing the role of the awkward teenager who refuses to ask for a ride home. After the US Fed’s latest rate cut-a decision about as thrilling as a tax audit but with less paperwork-the market has slumped, leaving BTC pinned below $100,000 like a deflated balloon at a funeral. 🎈

Key takeaways:

  • BTC’s shot at $100,000 before Jan. 1? A 30% chance-odds that would make a Vegas bookie blush. 🎲

  • Bitcoin treasury buying has slowed to a crawl, as if institutions collectively hit a caffeine crash and forgot how to function. ☕

  • Resistance at $94,000? More like a stubborn door that won’t budge, even after you knock politely for 21 days. 🚪

30% chance BTC reclaims $100,000 before New Year

Polymarket and Kalshi traders have made it clear: Bitcoin is staying in the “meh” zone. As of Dec. 11, Kalshi bettors are giving BTC a 34% shot at breaking $100K by Dec. 31, while Polymarket’s 29% odds sound like a polite way of saying, “Good luck, pal.”

Bitcoin’s December high? A modest $94,600. Last time it flirted with $100,000 was Nov. 13, which now feels like a lifetime ago in crypto years (read: three days). 🕰️

Why the slump? Blame macroeconomic uncertainties-because nothing says “stable” like a global economy-and a slowdown in Bitcoin treasury buys. Institutions are apparently taking a coffee break, and their wallets are following suit. ☕

Data shows companies are buying BTC at a slower pace than a sloth on a treadmill. If this trend continues, we might see a Bitcoin shortage in institutional coffee cups. ☕

Despite the buying slump, Polymarket odds for Strategy selling Bitcoin remain low. But hey, at least they’re not selling their soul. Yet. 🧬

Meanwhile, Polymarket traders are 65% sure Strategy will buy over 1,000 BTC this week. That’s the confidence of someone who just won a bet on a coin flip. 🪙

Last week, Strategy expanded its Bitcoin stash to 660,624 BTC after shelling out $962.7 million. If this keeps up, they’ll have enough coins to replace every penny in your wallet. Just don’t expect them to share. 💸

Bitcoin’s upside could be capped at $98,000

CryptoMoon Markets Pro and TradingView say BTC is stuck in an ascending triangle, doing the geometric dance of resistance. Analyst Daan Crypto Trades summed it up best: “Pushing against this resistance again.” Sounds like a workout for your wallet. 💪

If BTC breaks above $94,000, it could head toward $108,000. But Daan warns it might only test the $98K zone, where “a good amount of liquidity is located.” Translation: Hope springs eternal, but don’t get your hopes up. 🌱

CryptoMoon reports buyers need to push BTC above $94,589 to unlock the gates to $98K-$100K. Sounds like the price of a decent latte, but in crypto terms, it’s a mountain. ☕🏔️

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2025-12-11 18:53