Behold, dear reader, the latest onchain sorcery: Bitcoin’s top ten mining pools now command a staggering 94.2% of the global hashrate! And what do they do with their power? Why, hoard 55,000 BTC like a squirrel with a golden nut stash, of course. 🤑😂
As of today, the ten grandmasters of Bitcoin mining—Foundry, Antpool, ViaBTC, F2pool, MARA Pool, Spider Pool, SEC Pool, Luxor, Binance Pool, and Braiins Pool—lord over the network like a pack of wolves in a blockchain forest. Foundry, the self-proclaimed king of the hill, wields 30.88% of the hashrate and guards a hoard of 772.652 BTC (down from 2,000 BTC in March 2024—what a generous mood swing!). Coinbase, that ever-faithful squire, flanks Foundry in its financial escapades.
Antpool, the second-in-command, clutches 441.839 BTC and also consorts with Coinbase. ViaBTC, the third wheel, owns Coinex and likely whispers sweet nothings to it. Meanwhile, F2pool, with 10.42% of the hashrate, hoards 495.322 BTC and dances with Coinbase and Cobo. A charming cast of characters, wouldn’t you say? 😏
MARA Pool, the self-styled “treasury wizard,” guards 50,000 BTC and 11,034 BTC (totaling $1.3B!) like a dragon in a spreadsheet. Spider Pool, with 4.22% of the hashrate, holds 157.994 BTC and also fancies Coinbase. SEC Pool, the shy cousin, clings to 28.616 BTC and flirts with Coinbase and Cobo. Luxor Tech, with 2.71% of the hashrate, hoards 75.278 BTC and, naturally, Coinbase.
Binance Pool, the eighth marvel, commands 2.09% of the hashrate but guards a whopping 41,919 BTC ($4.96B!). Braiins Pool, the once-mighty Slush, now clutches 30.983 BTC and sighs wistfully. Together, these ten titans hold 55,117.77 BTC ($6.52B)—a treasure trove that would make a pirate blush. 🏴☠️
These miners, dear reader, are not mere custodians of Bitcoin—they are architects of greed, weaving a tapestry of power and BTC. Their stash? A financial empire built on blocks and bravado. Whether for treasuries, collateral, or sheer narcissism, their hoarding is a masterclass in blockchain theater. 🎭
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2025-07-30 21:03