qfx

Now, Oracle (ORCL +9.32%) – that’s a curious beast. They’ve been boasting about their earnings, claiming everything’s tickety-boo, and that fears of their software being replaced by these newfangled ‘AI’ contraptions are vastly exaggerated. They’ve even promised more goodies by 2027. Sounds like a lot of hot air to me, but the market seemed to swallow it whole, sending the stock up 9% to $163.12. A bit like a magician distracting you while picking your pocket, wouldn’t you say?

CoreWeave ended up 9.4% higher, and Oracle jumped 9.2%. It’s the kind of percentage that makes you briefly consider a career change. Maybe alpaca farming. Less volatile. Although, I suppose alpaca feed prices are subject to market forces, too. Everything is, isn’t it?

The whole thing reeks of the late 90s, only this time the dot-coms have been replaced by GPU farms. Everyone’s scrambling for a piece of the pie, convinced this time it’s different. It’s NEVER different. It’s always just a new way to separate fools from their money. But hey, who am I to argue with momentum? I’m just a guy watching the whole thing burn, taking notes, and occasionally placing a cynical bet or two. And right now, the signal is… well, it’s deafening. Even if the global economy decides to stage a dramatic collapse – Iran, inflation, the usual suspects – this AI delusion will likely stagger on. They’ve got too much invested in the story.

Let’s be blunt: filling up your gas tank is about to become a more… intimate experience. More intimate with your wallet, that is. Oil goes in, money goes out. Groundbreaking analysis, I know. But seriously, gas prices are the canary in the coal mine of inflation. They change daily, sometimes hourly. It’s enough to give a macro strategist a nervous twitch. Historically, we’ve seen inflation averages around 3.8%. Pleasant. But we’ve also seen it rocket to 20% in 1920. A time when flappers and high inflation went hand-in-hand. The market doesn’t love high inflation. When it goes above 5%, S&P 500 returns tend to average around 2.4%. It’s like trying to waltz with a lead balloon.

There is, first, the matter of Rivian. A venture predicated on the promise of electric conveyance, it exists now in a state of near-completion, perpetually on the verge of either ascension or dissolution. The company, should it survive, is poised to introduce the R2, a vehicle that, should it prove commercially viable, may or may not justify the considerable expenditure already incurred. One observes, with a detached curiosity, the allocation of resources, the relentless pursuit of a future that remains stubbornly elusive. It is a gamble, certainly, but one framed not by ambition, but by a sort of desperate necessity.

Before the day had fully succumbed to its inevitable disappointments, Sprinklr unveiled its fourth quarter and full fiscal 2026 numbers. Revenue, a shade under $221 million, rose a respectable nine percent year-over-year. Subscription revenue, the lifeblood of these digital endeavors, climbed six percent to over $193 million. Net income, adjusted for the usual accounting sleights of hand – a necessary fiction, wouldn’t you agree? – leaped sixteen percent to nearly $32 million, or $0.13 per share. A tidy sum. One begins to suspect someone, somewhere, is actually managing things.