US Lawmakers Say “No Way!” to Digital Dollar Surveillance Party 😆💰

With a dramatic vote of 27-22 on April 2, our gallant lawmakers propelled this monumental piece of legislation forward, setting the stage for an epic showdown in the full House. This bill, noble in its intent, seeks to shove a rather hefty stick in the gears of government surveillance, guarding the sacred treasure of privacy. Because who wouldn’t want to protect their secrets from the prying eyes of Big Brother? 🕵️‍♂️

Ethereum’s Rollercoaster: Will It Soar or Sink? 🎢💸

Ah, but what a time it is! The world watches as President Trump’s tariff announcement sends the crypto market spiraling into a chasm, erasing a staggering $140 billion in mere hours. Ethereum, that once-mighty titan, finds itself tumbling downwards, a mere 5% drop away from new lows, flirting with the $1,700 abyss.

Minecraft Movie Rotten Tomatoes Score Revealed

The movie is based on a well-known video game and features Jack Black in the role of Steve. He joins forces with four unlikely characters, portrayed by Jason Momoa (as “The Garbage Man”), Emma Myers (as Natalie), Danielle Brooks (as Dawn), and Sebastian Hansen (as Henry). In addition, Jennifer Coolidge takes on the character of Vice Principal Marlene.

Bitcoin’s Big Bounce: Will It Hit the Six-Figure Jackpot?

Bitcoin Chart Analysis

The Bitcoin express has been chugging along, and it’s found a cozy spot right on the 200 EMA, which is about as comfortable as a rocking chair on a porch in summer. The RSI is as neutral as Switzerland, which means there’s plenty of headroom for the bulls to start kicking up dust. If Bitcoin can lasso the moon between $87,000 and $89,000, we might just see it riding off into the six-figure sunset sooner than a jackrabbit on a date.

Gold Dips from Record High as Market Turmoil Sparks Profit-Taking

Earlier in the session, gold reached dizzying heights of $3,167.57, only to come crashing back down to earth like a failed balloon at a children’s birthday party. The spot price now hovers around $3,106.99, while U.S. gold futures have settled down 1.4% at $3,121.70. Ah, the joys of profit-taking and margin calls, how they bring a smile to the face of a struggling metals trader!